Needing advice badly

[Ray Tuley]

Greetings community, Most of the time I have at least a small clue about how to handle certain things, but with this one, I'm at a complete loss. I have a lady in my life that is my best friend. We have a 13 year history and have been through a lot together, good times, bad times, and everything in between. Now however, we are faced with something that seems only headed towards certain disaster. My friend is 64 years old and is homeless, like me, however she has a car to stay in. Recently, she was diagnosed with a condition wherein the cartilage in her hips is almost gone. She has been told that she needs both hips replaced right away, and that it is a wonder that she is even walking. She has also been told that if she doesn't have the procedures performed soon, she faces spending the rest of her life in a wheelchair. She is totally prepared to undergo the surgery(s), but there is a major obstacle in her way.

The doctors will not operate unless she has a home, so that she can recuperate correctly. Homeless shelters won't work, and we have investigated this as thoroughly as we could with the information we have, but we always end up at a dead end. The result is that she is still in her car, and her resolve is fast disappearing. I don't want her to die out in the cold in her car, but I cannot provide what she needs, since I too, am homeless and in search of a canvas tent that I can put a woodburning stove in, so that I can stay warm. I love her as much as anyone could love another, and quite frankly, I'm scared. This isn't about me, but this whole ordeal has brought up a lot of issues for me also. I feel incompetent and lame for not being able to provide for her, or myself for that matter. I know we both could use counseling, but that will not solve her situation. It is with trepidation that I humbly present my problem to the conscious community. Thank you, and many blessings

[Dr Pam]

Greetings community, Most of the time I have at least a small clue about how to handle certain things, but with this one, I'm at a complete loss.

The doctors will not operate unless she has a home, so that she can recuperate correctly. ...

Speak to a social worker at the hospital where the surgery would be done.

[earthsangha]

HiTuley,i want to tell you that there is a Shelter in Santa rosa that was created just for such a situation as your Friends...it is the Nightingale Project,where homeless people can recuperate from illnesses or surgeries,You can find out more from the Homeless Service Center at 600 Morgan St.santa rosa..(707)525-0226...good luck and happy Holidays..p.s. i am Homeless too.

[CSummer]

This web page tells about some supplements that can enable regrowth of hip cartilage - if there isn't bone-to-bone contact. I consider all such things to be experiments but worth trying if the cost isn't too great. I've also found hemp seed to really help my joints and connective tissue (I eat about a pound a week).

As far as a heatable shelter, I could probably help design one. Others would have to build it and fund the materials cost. I'm guessing you and your friend have looked into all options for help with renting a place?

C. Summer

[Tristique]

I heard this same story last year....hhhhmmmm???

Anyway, hospitals that do surgery have a short - term rehab/physical therapy program. Then, for long-term recovery and additional or extended therapy/rehab needs, the hospital will arrange for the person to go to a SNF - Skilled Nursing Facility, where they will stay until they are independent again. Medicare pays for 90 days of rehab at a SNF, if the person needs and is willingly participating in the therapy. So, given that your friend is 64 - she likely has Medicare and her doctor knows that...don't think he would say he can't do the surgery if she doesn't have a home. Hospitals even sometimes pay for hotels for people so...if the surgery is needed, the doc will do it. Either you are misinformed or this is a scam. I worked in Transitional Rehab and Acute Rehab at St. Joseph's hospital for 6 years and never heard of a doc saying they would not do surgery because of homelessness. There are other options for people.

The doctors will not operate unless she has a home, so that she can recuperate correctly. ...