Dr. Wal-Mart

[wbreitman]

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Bob says to Mike ….'My elbow hurts like the dickens!! I guess I'd better see a doctor.' 'Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,' Mike replies. 'There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart . Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs $10 - A lot cheaper than a doctor.' So, Bob deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits $10, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. 10 seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: 'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and Epsom salts found on aisle 2. Avoid heavy activity. It will improve in 2 weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.' That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Bob began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Bob hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results.. He deposits $10, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the following: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. 5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better! Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart.