Famous People's Jewish Mother

[wbreitman]

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'After all the money your father and I spent on
braces, this you call a smile?'

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' JEWISH MOTHER:
'I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call,
you didn't write...'

MICHELANGELO'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the
walls, like the other children? Do you know how hard it is to get that schmutz off the ceiling?'

NAPOLEON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'You're not hiding your report card? Show me! Take
your hand out of your jacket and show me!'

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Again with that hat! Why can't you wear a baseball
cap like the other kids?'

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Next time I catch you throwing money across the
Potomac , you can kiss your allowance good-bye!'

THOMAS EDISON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Okay, so I'm proud that you invented the electric
light bulb. Now turn it off already and go to sleep!'

PAUL REVERE'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'I don't care where you think you have to go, young
man, midnight is long past your bedtime!'

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Your senior photograph and you couldn't have done
something with your hair?'

MOSES' JEWISH MOTHER:
'Desert, schmesert!! Where have you really been for
the last forty years?'

BILL GATES' JEWISH MOTHER:
'It would have killed you to become a doctor?'

BILL CLINTON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Well, at least she was a nice Jewish girl.

[Barry]

BILL CLINTON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Well, at least she was a nice Jewish girl.

[sd gross]

JESUS CHRIST'S JEWISH MOTHER
"When you were running around all day Friday with your Goyishe friends, they did WHAT to you?"

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'After all the money your father and I spent on
braces, this you call a smile?'

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' JEWISH MOTHER:
'I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call,
you didn't write...'

MICHELANGELO'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the
walls, like the other children? Do you know how hard it is to get that schmutz off the ceiling?'

NAPOLEON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'You're not hiding your report card? Show me! Take
your hand out of your jacket and show me!'

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Again with that hat! Why can't you wear a baseball
cap like the other kids?'

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Next time I catch you throwing money across the
Potomac , you can kiss your allowance good-bye!'

THOMAS EDISON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Okay, so I'm proud that you invented the electric
light bulb. Now turn it off already and go to sleep!'

PAUL REVERE'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'I don't care where you think you have to go, young
man, midnight is long past your bedtime!'

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Your senior photograph and you couldn't have done
something with your hair?'

MOSES' JEWISH MOTHER:
'Desert, schmesert!! Where have you really been for
the last forty years?'

BILL GATES' JEWISH MOTHER:
'It would have killed you to become a doctor?'

BILL CLINTON'S JEWISH MOTHER:
'Well, at least she was a nice Jewish girl.