Prenatal Alcohol Damage

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I'm reposting this under a new title--Prenatal Alcohol Damage--and would love to hear from others as well as Shandi (thanks, Shandi) about their experiences, impressions, thoughts...even arguments. Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders are mis-labeled (among so very many other ways), in addition to AD/HD, bad kid, bad parenting: Bipolar, learning disabled, attachment disordered, oppositional-defiant. In fact it's kind of a giveaway, if one is wondering about a possible diagnosis of FASD, that one has amassed a whole string of "alphabet soup" diagnoses over the years. AD/HD, Bipolar, ASD, RAD, ODD, LD, sometimes OCD as well.

And what makes me think I know so fricken much? Well, for starters, as adoptive mom of a now-35-year-old, groping for help, grasping at straws, taking the poor little dude to doctor after shrink after allergist--finally when I was a school psych I learned about FASD. My son was then 16 and pretty crusted over with anger, unreachable mostly.

So I made it my life's work to learn about and change the situation for people with FASD. I've served as advisor to the Governor's Prevention Action Council (name?), clinical director of two county-hospital diagnostic clinics, founder of parent support groups, and author/consultant/trainer in the US and Mexico.

My son does great in situations of tremendous structure: jail, rehab, sober livng. He loves to work and with supervision really contributes and can actually be happy-ish. He's leaving the sober living place in January and thinks he'll then be free to really live...I am worried. He usually bumps into the law and gets sent back to jail pretty soon after getting sprung. He can't live with me because he thinks he is a thug, and can be really abusive.

So now, after retiring from my day job as mental health provider for Latino immigrants, I'm re-dedicating my time and energy to getting California better at recognizing, serving and preventing this scourge. And working with anyone who wants help around this subject.

Hoping to hear from you.

kathy

While we're on the subject of alcohol and its multifarious damages--and I speak as a happy imbiber--we should not overlook the effect of prenatal exposure. Not every fetus so exposed will take a big hit: some have a protective allele; other factors do make a difference; some fetal and maternal vulnerabilities are impossible to predict...plus a lot of the damage gets missed by standard testing.

BUT !!! Prenatal alcohol damage affects around 4% of us. It shows up as AD/HD, problems with judgment, planning, memory and reasoning. People with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders are almost never diagnosed correctly in many states of the US--Canada is way ahead of us, as are Alaska, Washington and Minnesota. And because it isn't diagnosed as the disability it is, people with FASD get punished, shamed, imprisoned, addicted...and impregnated early and often. And whoops there goes another generation.

Anyone raising adopted kids or grandkids whose behavior is puzzling and frustrating should consider FASD. Or if your own mom drank and you've always wondered why you're not functioning "up to your potential"...ditto. This is a spectrum--from apparently normal to pretty impaired. Please give me a holler if you want more information, resources, a sympathetic ear. ~ kathy

[Shandi]

Kathy,
Thank you so much for sharing from your personal experience. My belief is that the more we reveal what we ourselves struggle with, the stronger our true mutuality is, and in a community, that's a unifying element when dealing with "the slings and arrows of misfortune" that penetrate all of our lives in some way. Mental illness affects all of us- either directly or indirectly.

I'm reposting this under a new title--Prenatal Alcohol Damage--and would love to hear from others as well as Shandi (thanks, Shandi) about their experiences, ...