May we discuss Boundaries? [Archive]

mykil

10-25-2008, 10:52 AM

Are your boundaries controlling your life or someone else’s life? Have your boundaries got you down? I have been studying people’s margins for some time. Do you even know what boundaries you adhere to? Are limitations In the way of you having a real life and being all that you can be?
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It appears to me that there are a large percentage of peeps out there In the world that don’t even know they have these boundaries. they just kinda made way into their psyche when they were young and kinda evolved over time. Then there are a large portion of people that make up boundaries as they go along in life. Then there are restrictions that are not what one would expect sometimes. More on the lines of Phobias that have evolved into strict boundaries fears to be more precise, something along the lines of…
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Soooo, I ask Do you know what boundaries are in place in you life form, your essence, you heart, sprit and soul? Did you place these boundaries there to safe guard your reputation? are they your security blanket, or just out of pure desperation cause you thought you were going overboard and needed some sort of foundation in life’s evolution?
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May I ask you a question, or is this intruding on your space?
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When one speaks of boundaries are you the one that has the most to say or gain from this conversation?
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What age did you decide you need healthy boundaries?
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Over time did you boundaries just blurt out of pure desperation and timeless lost disciplines that needed to be dealt with?
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Did you go to school to learn how to put these boundaries in place?
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Are unhealthy boundaries a part of your life?
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Would you know how to spot an unhealthy boundary in your life or someone else’s situation?
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Have boundaries ever chased away someone you love as a friend or an intimate partner?
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Are boundaries a shellfish way of life, only thinking about how to make people respect your boundaries and thinking of nothing but such a thing, dwelling on a certain boundary issue that someone just happened upon and has to suffer endlessly for the rest of eternity cause you will not resolve an issue that has pushed a button beyond exchange? I see this allot it is what makes war! LOL! Oh and egos ya?
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How would you describe boundaries and spirituality combined as one? IS this on the right path with you essence or are they two separate entities?
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Who among us feels Mykil has no boundaries or shame? LOL! PEACE!
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alanora

10-25-2008, 11:32 AM

Boundaries are a shellfish kind of life...........am sure to be crossing one at this very moment.......

Are your boundaries controlling your life or someone else’s life? Have your boundaries got you down? I have been studying people’s margins for some time. Do you even know what boundaries you adhere to? Are limitations In the way of you having a real life and being all that you can be?
<o:p></o:p>
It appears to me that there are a large percentage of peeps out there In the world that don’t even know they have these boundaries. they just kinda made way into their psyche when they were young and kinda evolved over time. Then there are a large portion of people that make up boundaries as they go along in life. Then there are restrictions that are not what one would expect sometimes. More on the lines of Phobias that have evolved into strict boundaries fears to be more precise, something along the lines of…
<o:p></o:p>
Soooo, I ask Do you know what boundaries are in place in you life form, your essence, you heart, sprit and soul? Did you place these boundaries there to safe guard your reputation? are they your security blanket, or just out of pure desperation cause you thought you were going overboard and needed some sort of foundation in life’s evolution?
<o:p></o:p>
May I ask you a question, or is this intruding on your space?
<o:p></o:p>
When one speaks of boundaries are you the one that has the most to say or gain from this conversation?
<o:p></o:p>
What age did you decide you need healthy boundaries?
<o:p></o:p>
Over time did you boundaries just blurt out of pure desperation and timeless lost disciplines that needed to be dealt with?
<o:p></o:p>
Did you go to school to learn how to put these boundaries in place?
<o:p></o:p>
Are unhealthy boundaries a part of your life?
<o:p></o:p>
Would you know how to spot an unhealthy boundary in your life or someone else’s situation?
<o:p></o:p>
Have boundaries ever chased away someone you love as a friend or an intimate partner?
<o:p></o:p>
Are boundaries a shellfish way of life, only thinking about how to make people respect your boundaries and thinking of nothing but such a thing, dwelling on a certain boundary issue that someone just happened upon and has to suffer endlessly for the rest of eternity cause you will not resolve an issue that has pushed a button beyond exchange? I see this allot it is what makes war! LOL! Oh and egos ya?
<o:p></o:p>
How would you describe boundaries and spirituality combined as one? IS this on the right path with you essence or are they two separate entities?
<o:p></o:p>
Who among us feels Mykil has no boundaries or shame? LOL! PEACE!
<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>

MsTerry

10-25-2008, 12:29 PM

You are shameless!!!
you promised everybody to be shallow and now THIS?

Who among us feels Mykil has no boundaries or shame? LOL! PEACE!
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mykil

10-25-2008, 03:08 PM

I never once promised to be shallow, I said I practice being shallow and I try to be shallow! Good Try thou! Funny how the facts very from day to day with all that is going on in the world and in our lives, things are easily swayed and manipulated in different directions when people do not pay close attention! Not that I am setting any Boundaries mind you, because I am not to that extent in my life yet! <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
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I feel that boundaries are set by individuals that are not born with them, kinda like spirituality. I am aware enough for all of us, aware that maybe I am the only one that was actually born with spirituality attached to me. If you have to go to school to achieve theology, boundaries spirituality, sometimes this is were the problems begin. Spirituality and boundaries should come from within and not made up by others for you to feel you need to achieve a title and are now able to be standoffish in your own community because you have had council and are now more than adequate than others. I myself have my own gift in life and need no challenges to get me by. Acclimation is a tool, use it wisely. Being untaught to a community and seeing your surrounding change year to year does bitter the soul a bit, yet all in all it is still the same. The only change is in people’s opinion of life in particular. Evolution should not have to work both wayz! Yet over and over here we are. Kinda like a revolving door and you see it everywhere!<o:p></o:p>
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I believe people are and should try and better themselves in our society in this day and age for sure, they just seem to get way carried away and think nothing of the outcome they are trying to achieve. I was born with way too many boundaries and spirituality. I have tuned out as long as I could only peeking into people’s worlds watching them take over a word or two, just words, nothing more, nothing less. To me spirituality and boundaries have become nothing more than mere words. People have abused the actuality of the whole at such an extreme rate and severely depleted what boundaries and spirituality truly are that I am not sure what to make of the predicament and state of our ongoing state. Soon and maybe already so, you will not be able to achieve ultimate goals in life unless you own a cell phone! You will not be able to maintain certain boundaries without a simple cell phone. Sounds extreme but if you look around this is actually becoming a reality! Shallow is as shallow does. I try to be shallow and let the worlds pass me by while keeping my eye out for attractive eye candy, but…<o:p></o:p>
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Would love to go deep with a few that can develop a sense of humor toward the issue over time… LOL… PEACE!<o:p></o:p>
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You are shameless!!!
you promised everybody to be shallow and now THIS?

MsTerry

10-25-2008, 03:40 PM

Mykil, do you lock your door to your store every night?

Not that I am setting any Boundaries mind you, because I am not to that extent in my life yet! <o:p></o:p>

mykil

10-25-2008, 06:02 PM

Yes and I learned this without going to school!

Mykil, do you lock your door to your store every night?

MsTerry

10-25-2008, 07:05 PM

somebody schooled you those boundaries

Yes and I learned this without going to school!

mykil

10-25-2008, 07:53 PM

MsTerry

10-25-2008, 09:30 PM

not having any or few boundaries can be very unhealthy and sometimes outright dangerous
a woman for instance, will necessitate different boundaries than men, just for survival

<link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CADMINI%7E1%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><o:smarttagtype namespaceuri="urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" name="place"></o:smarttagtype><style>  </style> Do I have unhealthy boundaries at this moment in my life and can I spot them?

mykil

10-26-2008, 10:09 AM

MsTerry

10-26-2008, 03:55 PM

Mykil,
Even though it looks like one question, there are several Q's hidden in your pondering, partly because of your studied neglect of grammar and pronunciation!
But, yes, I have, just like everybody else, chosen my own prison or boundaries. What might seem unhealthy for you (the extrovert) is actually healthy for me (the introvert).
You are also assuming that I am the same in person in real life as I am in writing. This is only partially true, I have quite a rich life but am not surrounded by the lack of spirituality so often displayed here.
You, my friend, are more spiritual than you like to display, but instead, you go for the laughs,(just like me.LOL)
Is that unhealthy?

<link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CADMINI%7E1%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><style>  </style> Do you MzT. Consider your abilities to keep people at afar a really healthy boundary or an unhealthy boundary? Why is this boundary so<link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CADMINI%7E1%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><style>  </style> sufficient for your survival?

mykil

10-26-2008, 05:20 PM

MsTerry

10-26-2008, 10:02 PM

I think you have the general misconception about the difference between an intro- and an extro-vert.
So this is how it has been explained to me
An extro gets recharged from being with people
An intro gets recharged from not being with people

<link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CADMINI%7E1%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><style>  </style> Well I will have to say that is kind of cute. The way you describe me as extrovert, yet I don’t even go out. I might go out once a month and mingle. I do not drink, I do not smoke anything. I do not use any kind of stimulate of any kind, ever! I do on occasion take Ibuprofen when I lift a tad bit too much but… Hell I am soooo friggin straight; I don’t even go to church anymore!!! I really don’t even date anymore. I will start again soon I hope! I do love however the fact that people and their minds a wonder with my fertile written language, they seem to think I am some sort of slut. Although I have no reason what so ever to change the thought patterns of the general public. I sometime fantasize about being a slut and living this gregarious lifestyle as you say. But then again what the hay!
<o:p> </o:p>

Sooo in my humble opinion, you are right about people sometimes seeking an assumption about whom we all really appear to be. I love to write and tell it like I see it, venting on occasion and being somewhat of an extravagant force in terms of written skills, while other times just blurting things out as to say fuck you all! And sooo do you, although your style is lacking, err a tad bit diverse than mine, we appear to be on a related track in life. Mine being the high road mind you!
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Can you explain to me what the word spirituality means to you? What it used to mean? What the evolution of a word has evolved to at this point in time? Has the word changed in the last thirty years?OPEN THE DOOR! ohhhh prudence, come out and playyyyyyyyyyy
For me spirituality means being aware of one's actions

<o:p> </o:p> Do you feel people can evolve without coming into contact with other people? More so do you think one can evolve from reading a book, this is an important question mind you?
people will evolve no matter what, not always into what is desirable.
Books are only good as a kick in the butt, after reading them, you've got to do the real work

mykil

10-26-2008, 11:22 PM

MsTerry

10-27-2008, 09:01 AM

Yes of course there are many ways to get from A to Z.

If you are not aware of your limitations (or possibilities depending on how you want to look at it) you will always bump into yourself (impatience, anger).
It is from this point you can grow (evolve) using real contact with others as a mirror.
But the reason there are monasteries, meditation retreats and the like, is to get in touch with those boundaries, to define our prison walls and then use this reflection as a tool to navigate daily life.

<link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CADMINI%7E1%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><style>  </style><link rel="File-List" href="file:///C:%5CDOCUME%7E1%5CADMINI%7E1%5CLOCALS%7E1%5CTemp%5Cmsohtml1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml"><style>  </style> In my personal experiences, there is no association of grown without the contact between real people. Thus no evolution. Boundaries really seem to get in the way of personal growth. Some people are sooo bound by their own fears; their spirituality or their own religions that they will never get out of their shell.
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mykil

10-27-2008, 10:56 AM

Sooo Do you feel you may have personal growth thru pain and suffering? Or dissolution? Have you Misty Ever been to a monastery ?

Yes of course there are many ways to get from A to Z.

If you are not aware of your limitations (or possibilities depending on how you want to look at it) you will always bump into yourself (impatience, anger).
It is from this point you can grow (evolve) using real contact with others as a mirror.
But the reason there are monasteries, meditation retreats and the like, is to get in touch with those boundaries, to define our prison walls and then use this reflection as a tool to navigate daily life.

MsTerry

10-27-2008, 11:26 AM

Yes
Yes
Yes

Sooo Do you feel you may have personal growth thru pain and suffering? Or dissolution? Have you Misty Ever been to a monastery ?

mykil

10-27-2008, 11:37 AM

Yes
Yes
Yes

I do not see how...

mykil

10-27-2008, 11:32 PM

OK; let’s say we cut to the chase! May I ask, do you MzT. Feel in any way shape or form that the people in this new era of manifestations, are the people manifesting their futures, by asking our universe for certain things, ya know like in the secret, are they crossing any boundaries? Any supernatural boundaries? Are they no more than common witches? Shouldn’t we be out on a witch hunt and burn these individuals at the stake? Are they crossing boundaries that should not be crossed? Are they doing us all harm? Are they harming everyone’s environment? Are they taking away our own spiritualities with one fell swoop? Are they raping the environment just like the oil tycoons and the pollution in the seas skis and lands that we all need to survive? Should we make new boundaries before it is to late to over see the universe just like our depleted oceans? Hmmm food for thought? Or not?<o:p></o:p>

MsTerry

10-28-2008, 10:02 AM

NO, NO, NO,NO,NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO but you are right it does make me hungry. What great things have you been brewing lately? any thing low-fat?

OK; let’s say we cut to the chase! May I ask, do you MzT. Feel in any way shape or form that the people in this new era of manifestations, are the people manifesting their futures, by asking our universe for certain things, ya know like in the secret, are they crossing any boundaries? Any supernatural boundaries? Are they no more than common witches? Shouldn’t we be out on a witch hunt and burn these individuals at the stake? Are they crossing boundaries that should not be crossed? Are they doing us all harm? Are they harming everyone’s environment? Are they taking away our own spiritualities with one fell swoop? Are they raping the environment just like the oil tycoons and the pollution in the seas skis and lands that we all need to survive? Should we make new boundaries before it is to late to over see the universe just like our depleted oceans? Hmmm food for thought? Or not?<o:p></o:p>

mykil

10-28-2008, 10:09 AM

I think I like it better when you scream yes yes yes yes yes and then my name!

mykil

10-28-2008, 10:32 AM

Aright let me utter a few feeling I have after studying these personal boundaries and personal evolutionary aspects in people’s lives from time to time. [Well like forever]... It appears to me, ok maybe it’s just me, that people can read all the books about spirituality they want, or any book or lessons for this matter, yet they will not evolve one bit unless they are out In the world in contact with new people. IF you were on a mountain top in <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Tibet</st1:place></st1:country-region> in a monastery being taught by monks, then you were evolving. But if you were sitting in pure silence with no one around, no matter what you put in your mind this will not evolve you. There will be no growth! There will be no personal growth without the add-on of human companionship. This is a tad bit hard for me to explain, but I truly feel it is important! If you read a book by yourself. You have this knowledge, yet that is all it is and it has done you no good. But when you go to your friends house and discuss this book, it becomes evolutionary! You have just evolved. You need this interaction to make this possible. I feel the same goes with touch. If you reach out and touch someone you will grow. Just the touch of someone else’s DNA will make you grow. Now SEX… So in essence the truly best thing you can do for personal growth is to reach out and touch someone. Oh and I am right here! LMAO!!!

MsTerry

10-28-2008, 11:06 AM

If you reach out and touch someone you will grow. Just the touch of someone else’s DNA will make you grow. Now SEX… So in essence the truly best thing you can do for personal growth is to reach out and touch someone. Oh and I am right here! LMAO!!!
I was hoping that it would grow, just with you THINKING about me.

MsTerry

10-28-2008, 11:16 AM

I agree, that reading books is anti-social while watching a good movie together can give you some shared instant gratification.
But in order to be exposed to evolutionary teachings, a book is a good start, it gives you the time to digest a new way of looking at life
Comprehending and practicing or living a spiritual life are two different things. Some people can talk up a good storm, but don't practice what they preach, while others might live the holy life without being aware of it, it just comes naturally.
Where do you fit in?

Aright let me utter a few feeling I have after studying these personal boundaries and personal evolutionary aspects in people’s lives from time to time. [Well like forever]... It appears to me, ok maybe it’s just me, that people can read all the books about spirituality they want, or any book or lessons for this matter, yet they will not evolve one bit unless they are out In the world in contact with new people. IF you were on a mountain top in <st1:country-region w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Tibet</st1:place></st1:country-region> in a monastery being taught by monks, then you were evolving. But if you were sitting in pure silence with no one around, no matter what you put in your mind this will not evolve you. There will be no growth! There will be no personal growth without the add-on of human companionship. This is a tad bit hard for me to explain, but I truly feel it is important! If you read a book by yourself. You have this knowledge, yet that is all it is and it has done you no good. But when you go to your friends house and discuss this book, it becomes evolutionary! You have just evolved. You need this interaction to make this possible.

mykil

10-28-2008, 12:41 PM

VAGUE VAGUE VAGUE!!! You are being about as vague and as un-expressional as one might be! I believe the fact of the matter might be, and I truly have come to believe this mind you, that digesting such an event as a book you read by yourself or a show you watch on TV if not shared with someone else is meaningless. If you keep this information bottled in your own true mind and cannot share it with anyone does it exist?
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A million books of the most valuable information in our universe is written and published. One million people buy these books and they read them, never meeting or ever discussing the valuable important information written text that was to be shared with one and all. These One million people never meet, never exchange a word about the book with anyone at any time. What becomes of the information? Does anyone what so ever gain from the knowledge? Now you may say one million people gained this awareness, but did they? If they have not given out these valuable understandings, shared it with others to speak, than what became of it? Did anyone advance from this process?

MsTerry

10-28-2008, 01:21 PM

If they never meet, there is no need to know.
Have you ever met a God-intoxicated person? They can't stop talking and "teaching" about The Way.

Now that we know what you don't like, what would you like to share, what do you think everybody should know?

<o:p></o:p>
A million books of the most valuable information in our universe is written and published. One million people buy these books and they read them, never meeting or ever discussing the valuable important information written text that was to be shared with one and all. These One million people never meet, never exchange a word about the book with anyone at any time. What becomes of the information? Does anyone what so ever gain from the knowledge? Now you may say one million people gained this awareness, but did they? If they have not given out these valuable understandings, shared it with others to speak, than what became of it? Did anyone advance from this process?

mykil

10-28-2008, 01:40 PM

Will that was just the wrong answer now wasn’t it?! Now the right answer should have been, ya know if ya ever bother to pay attention to me and what I write, yes if one of those people went out and touched someone even a simple touch would communicate all that information thru some stupid sort of scientific DNA exchange and it would then be apart of the collective. Spread like wildfire!!! For collective to collective till the entire world was aware! Hmmmm!

Sylph

10-28-2008, 02:37 PM

Will that was just the wrong answer now wasn’t it?! Now the right answer should have been, ya know if ya ever bother to pay attention to me and what I write, yes if one of those people went out and touched someone even a simple touch would communicate all that information thru some stupid sort of scientific DNA exchange and it would then be apart of the collective. Spread like wildfire!!! For collective to collective till the entire world was aware! Hmmmm!

Maybe I'm overstepping a boundary by getting into this conversation with you two!
Of course, people are positively affected by books. I can think of books that changed my life in some concrete... or less tangible ways. You can be positively affected without having discussed the book. You may start doing something positive or stop doing something unconstructive...and that changes your life. A book can help you take a more positive course in life. Discussing the book will undoubtedly bring in new ideas and help you integrate the information, but it's not necessary to the process.
All this talk about boundaries as related to spirituality is interesting. I'm not sure how the two concepts intersect, but it's food for thought.
Mykil, can you give some examples of situations where a person's boundaries get in the way of their personal growth? Most of what I've studied about boundaries tell me that it's the people with the fuzzy boundaries that have the most dysfunctional relationships. When my kids were younger I was too enmeshed with their lives. My boundaries reached out to the extent that their pain was my pain, etc. I can see that, now that years have passed and they don't live with me anymore. I think it's a fairly typical story of a committed parent, but caused problems for me and my kids. It's a delicate balance.
I have a friend who has erected some pretty limiting boundaries around himself to protect himself from being hurt. He's an extreme example, but it's a system that seems to work for him. He had a longtime friend who included him in her family over many years, he was even the godfather of one of her kids. She tended to belittle him and treat him poorly at times, in his opinion. At a certain point, he had had enough and cut her out of his life abruptly. It drove her crazy, since she hadn't seen it coming, but he was adamant and hasn't even spoken to her in years. He has no regrets, but it was hard on her!
All the discussion has been a bit vague. Please give some examples!

MsTerry

10-28-2008, 02:44 PM

Mykil if you are the gatekeeper of the right answer to all your questions, I think you should write a book!
:wink:

Will that was just the wrong answer now wasn’t it?! Now the right answer should have been, ya know if ya ever bother to pay attention to me and what I write, yes if one of those people went out and touched someone even a simple touch would communicate all that information thru some stupid sort of scientific DNA exchange and it would then be apart of the collective. Spread like wildfire!!! For collective to collective till the entire world was aware! Hmmmm!

mykil

10-28-2008, 05:00 PM

MzT.; I am glad you are starting to se things my way! still I am going to need more of a stern argument for my book sooo please indulge me a tad bit. You have been to a monastery yes. Tell us a little about he experiences you have had!
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Sylph; if you read a book and it changes your life, believe me others around you know about it! Your children, you spouse your friends even your hairstylist feels the change weather it is for good or evil! You, under no circumstances, keep this book to your self! For you, I think that would be impossibility! People around you can feel it oozing form you hair for god sakes! May we discuss the boundaries a tad bit later; I need to go deliver furnishings to peoples that need to be furnished this eve!

Mykil if you are the gatekeeper of the right answer to all your questions, I think you should write a book!
:wink:

MsTerry

10-28-2008, 10:02 PM

I know what you are up to.
You want me to provide the info, so you can claim that you wrote a book doing social studies.

MzT.; I am glad you are starting to se things my way! still I am going to need more of a stern argument for my book sooo please indulge me a tad bit. You have been to a monastery yes. Tell us a little about he experiences you have had!
<o:p></o:p>

alanora

10-29-2008, 07:20 AM

Perhaps, in the evolutionary times upon us, touching with the physical will be like a game of patty-cake. Where the real connection and growth happens will be with a sort of soul check in, a mind meld for lack of a better term as mind is not so involved, with more sweetness and pleasure than can be imagined with our minds. Lets get out of our minds for a moment. I was brought to tears of wonder and love yesterday as the drops I was wiping up from the bathtub looked like pearls of such exquisite beauty that all was right with the world. Cleaning the bathtub folks. Perhaps it was my new progressive glasses or the angle of the sun. I choose to think of it as one of those momentary gifts we can reflect upon, one that evokes gratitude and appreciation always. I used to grasp at such moments and try and get them back etc. That place is real, this one is illusionary. my $.02. Blessings, may you experience many moments today that warm your heart and soul forever. Mindy

I know what you are up to.
You want me to provide the info, so you can claim that you wrote a book doing social studies.

mykil

10-29-2008, 01:48 PM

Hey; thank you for the evolutionary pearls of wisdom! I swear I wanted to cry!!! Personal grown, thru happiness, thru little droplets of water? I am impressed! Even more impressed that you felt everyone should grow form you wonderful insight of even what a small droplet of water can do to someone! I will play patty cake with you darling!

mykil

11-01-2008, 10:49 AM

Spirituality, in a narrow sense, concerns itself with matters of the spirit (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spirit), a concept closely tied to religious belief (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion) and faith (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faith), a transcendent reality (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transcendence_(religion)), or one or more deities (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deity). Spiritual matters are thus those matters regarding humankind (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human)'s ultimate nature (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_nature) and purpose, not only as material (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Material) biological (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biological) organisms (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Organisms), but as beings (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beings) with a unique relationship to that which is perceived to be beyond both time (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time) and the material (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Material) world (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World). Spirituality also implies the mind-body dichotomy (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mind-body_dichotomy), which indicates a separation between the body (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body) and soul (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soul).<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
As such, the spiritual is traditionally contrasted with the material (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Material), the temporal (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temporal) and the worldly (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_(theology)). A perceived sense (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sense) of connection forms a central defining characteristic of spirituality — connection to a metaphysical (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysical) reality greater than oneself, which may include an emotional experience (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Experience) of religious awe (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sublime_(philosophy)) and reverence (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacred), or such states as satori (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satori) or nirvana (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nirvana_(state)). Equally importantly, spirituality relates to matters of sanity (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sanity) and of psychological health (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychology). Spirituality is the personal, subjective dimension of religion (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion), particularly that which pertains to liberation (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moksha) or salvation (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salvation) (see also mysticism (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mysticism) and esoterism (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esoterism)) .<o:p></o:p>
Spirituality as a way of life concerns itself with aligning the human will and mind with that dimension of life and the universe that is harmonious and ordered. As such spiritual disciplines (which are often part of an established religious tradition) enjoin practitioners (trainees or disciples) to cultivate those higher potentialities of the human being that are more noble and refined (wisdom and virtue). Accordingly, many spiritual traditions across diverse cultures share similar vocabulary. Terms such as the "path", the "work", the "practice" are universally applied to the ongoing discipline involved in transforming the coarser energies present in the human soul into more subtle and pleasing ones. As a spiritual practitioner one seeks to become free of the lesser egoic self (or ego (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ego_(spirituality))) in favor of being more fully one's "true" <o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
Above is the WikipidiA Version of Spirituality, as you may, or some may not see, is that Boundaries have a lot to do with Spirituality in general. In order to achieve spirituality or nirvana you must adhere to some certain and for-certain boundaries. The never ever ending search for ones spirituality is essential to co-inside with strong boundaries. So it would seem! Why not establish boundaries to achieve such a task I ask? Hmmm; well in most cases there really is no need to associate one with such an event? Boundaries and spirituality are on the same side, the same team, they are both soo narrow there is no room to maneuver in ones life once they take a strong foothold on ones soul. Not that most need to maneuver much, they are happy just sitting in a monastery on a hill in Tibet err wherever the hell they are and wherever they seem to be coming from, going to, or going thru! I think that most are born with the spirituality we all want. Somewhere along the line they lose it. Now they want it back! Build some boundaries thru pure fear from some god awful event in their lives that traumatized the hell out of them and BOOM! Let US try to achieve spirituality while we are at it! Let US not let anyone get close to *US* or even let them practice the same level of spirituality we are after. They might get there first and not let us in! The shallower versions are for watching learning and laughing! There is nothing quite like seeing these superficial boundaries and superficial paths of enlightenment! I love to take note and really just be in the now with whomever I am in the room with, taken on not only their certain characteristics, matching there thoughts one on one, even resounding their own voice so they may understand me a tad bit easier while even accepting me as on their cloud. It is cute and I love to pretend sooo. Sort of like playing with Barbie dolls I can only assume, I love to play with Barbie’s! When you come upon someone that is in such need of guidance that you almost wanna cry what should you do? Should you jut let them be? Should you want to help and try and make them see that some of the boundaries they are adhering to are ruining there own creation? Should you make your own boundaries as to not let these people in so you can be as shallow as them and everyone will just be stuck in their own little worlds not really ever coming out to play! Hmmm just a morning vent in the theology of man kind that probably has you all scratching you heads saying YA Mykil is really out there ya?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>

MsTerry

11-01-2008, 05:06 PM

Mykil?
Are you leaving us?

Spirituality, in a narrow sense, concerns itself with matters of the spirit (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spirit), a concept closely tied to religious belief (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion) and faith (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Faith), a transcendent reality (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transcendence_%28religion%29), or one or more deities (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deity). Spiritual matters are thus those matters regarding humankind (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human)'s ultimate nature (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Human_nature) and purpose, not only as material (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Material) biological (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Biological) organisms (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Organisms), but as beings (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beings) with a unique relationship to that which is perceived to be beyond both time (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time) and the material (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Material) world (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World). Spirituality also implies the mind-body dichotomy (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mind-body_dichotomy), which indicates a separation between the body (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Body) and soul (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soul).<o:p></o:p>
As such, the spiritual is traditionally contrasted with the material (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Material), the temporal (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Temporal) and the worldly (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_%28theology%29). A perceived sense (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sense) of connection forms a central defining characteristic of spirituality — connection to a metaphysical (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metaphysical) reality greater than oneself, which may include an emotional experience (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Experience) of religious awe (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sublime_%28philosophy%29) and reverence (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sacred), or such states as satori (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satori) or nirvana (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nirvana_%28state%29). Equally importantly, spirituality relates to matters of sanity (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sanity) and of psychological health (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychology). Spirituality is the personal, subjective dimension of religion (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion), particularly that which pertains to liberation (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moksha) or salvation (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salvation) (see also mysticism (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mysticism) and esoterism (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esoterism)) .<o:p></o:p>
Spirituality as a way of life concerns itself with aligning the human will and mind with that dimension of life and the universe that is harmonious and ordered. As such spiritual disciplines (which are often part of an established religious tradition) enjoin practitioners (trainees or disciples) to cultivate those higher potentialities of the human being that are more noble and refined (wisdom and virtue). Accordingly, many spiritual traditions across diverse cultures share similar vocabulary. Terms such as the "path", the "work", the "practice" are universally applied to the ongoing discipline involved in transforming the coarser energies present in the human soul into more subtle and pleasing ones. As a spiritual practitioner one seeks to become free of the lesser egoic self (or ego (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ego_%28spirituality%29)) in favor of being more fully one's "true" <o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
Above is the WikipidiA Version of Spirituality, as you may, or some may not see, is that Boundaries have a lot to do with Spirituality in general. In order to achieve spirituality or nirvana you must adhere to some certain and for-certain boundaries. The never ever ending search for ones spirituality is essential to co-inside with strong boundaries. So it would seem! Why not establish boundaries to achieve such a task I ask? Hmmm; well in most cases there really is no need to associate one with such an event? Boundaries and spirituality are on the same side, the same team, they are both soo narrow there is no room to maneuver in ones life once they take a strong foothold on ones soul. Not that most need to maneuver much, they are happy just sitting in a monastery on a hill in Tibet err wherever the hell they are and wherever they seem to be coming from, going to, or going thru! I think that most are born with the spirituality we all want. Somewhere along the line they lose it. Now they want it back! Build some boundaries thru pure fear from some god awful event in their lives that traumatized the hell out of them and BOOM! Let US try to achieve spirituality while we are at it! Let US not let anyone get close to *US* or even let them practice the same level of spirituality we are after. They might get there first and not let us in! The shallower versions are for watching learning and laughing! There is nothing quite like seeing these superficial boundaries and superficial paths of enlightenment! I love to take note and really just be in the now with whomever I am in the room with, taken on not only their certain characteristics, matching there thoughts one on one, even resounding their own voice so they may understand me a tad bit easier while even accepting me as on their cloud. It is cute and I love to pretend sooo. Sort of like playing with Barbie dolls I can only assume, I love to play with Barbie’s! When you come upon someone that is in such need of guidance that you almost wanna cry what should you do? Should you jut let them be? Should you want to help and try and make them see that some of the boundaries they are adhering to are ruining there own creation? Should you make your own boundaries as to not let these people in so you can be as shallow as them and everyone will just be stuck in their own little worlds not really ever coming out to play! Hmmm just a morning vent in the theology of man kind that probably has you all scratching you heads saying YA Mykil is really out there ya?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>

mykil

11-01-2008, 07:51 PM

I Misty, am just getting started!

MsTerry

11-01-2008, 08:02 PM

iS THERE A BEGINNING OR AN END?

I Misty, am just getting started!

mykil

11-01-2008, 08:31 PM

Are you in a hurry?

MsTerry

11-01-2008, 09:48 PM

No, but I do collect clocks

Are you in a hurry?

nurturetruth

11-02-2008, 01:41 AM

The notion of a boundary is very much culturally defined, since the norm for what is considered a proper boundary varies from culture to culture.

There are many infamous quotes which makes reference to the notion "love and or the Universe knows no boundaries"..... due to being in a constant state of expansion.

Yet, I can't help but to trust that Life gives us opportunities to learn the skills to be able to tune in and recognize energetically when something does or does not work ... (like having a mosquito land on us who wishes to feed off us)
A healthy boundary could also be seen as "reclaiming your energy field", "your sacred space" , and "reclaiming your power/sense of self/autonomy".

I definitely believe there exists an energy space around each "living" being.

Many of us, especially those in the healing profession, have a desire to connect with others deeply and meaningfully. The energetic rule is that :
we can only afford merging with others as much as we have mastered the ability to separate ourselves from others.
Perhaps when we learn how to define ourselves completely, can we then merge with others, and not get lost. Therefore we need to practice the discipline of separating from others for the purpose of gathering ourselves into our own field, to find out who we are, so that then we could truly merge with others in a way that is safe and joyful.

P.s.. i think a good question might be: What is on the other side of the boundary?

https://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii65/sealestial/WHITE_PICKET_FENCE.jpg (https://s261.photobucket.com/albums/ii65/sealestial/?action=view&current=WHITE_PICKET_FENCE.jpg)

MsTerry

11-02-2008, 07:35 AM

The real question is
Are you trying to keep things out or in with your boundaries

P.s.. i think a good question might be: What is on the other side of the boundary?

https://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii65/sealestial/WHITE_PICKET_FENCE.jpg (https://s261.photobucket.com/albums/ii65/sealestial/?action=view&current=WHITE_PICKET_FENCE.jpg)

NudeTea

11-02-2008, 08:27 AM

My boundaries are sheer self-protectionism. My earliest childhood involved brothers and sisters taking my toys, my space. Grade school not much better, as I found my classmates belittling me and/or each other with snotty remarks about who wore glasses or had a big nose or crooked eyes, etc. It's been my experience that the worst child-abusers can be a kid's own classmates. These taunts can stay with ya a lifetime.

Thrust into school against my will as I was, I am now an adult who takes advantage of my right to choose my friends and how close I let them into my life and thoughts. Adults, not any different than large school-kids, still smear each other with judgments, and really ... I just want to live in peace.

In the interest of peace, I have established many boundaries. I try not to intrude on others' and do my best to protect myself from the multiplicity of turf wars all around me.

Thanks for the post, Mykil. Excellent topic. 2 gratitudes to you.

shellebelle

11-02-2008, 07:18 PM

The edge of my mesa! Watch that first step it's a douzy!

https://farm4.static.flickr.com/3197/2997377503_5254d2b0ae_o.jpg (https://www.flickr.com/photos/shellerae/2997377503/)

BUT if I like you I leave the ladder down so you can find your way back but the hike is not much fun.

P.s.. i think a good question might be: What is on the other side of the boundary?

https://i261.photobucket.com/albums/ii65/sealestial/WHITE_PICKET_FENCE.jpg (https://s261.photobucket.com/albums/ii65/sealestial/?action=view&current=WHITE_PICKET_FENCE.jpg)

hales

11-02-2008, 08:23 PM

Mykil, and everyone,
Thank you for the excellent topic and spirited discussion of boundaries, especially as it relates to spirituality.. I work in a helping profession, (massage), so this topic is close to home for me. I was also reading a thread on the pros and cons of Sebastopol as compared to other towns.. I found that there was a bit of judgment and pettiness on that thread, however, I do want to offer a sincere appreciation of Sebastopol.. I live in Sonoma and sincerely appreciate the relative openness and acceptance of me that I have found in S-town. I actually feel more at home there than in my own town.

(I had a great day, today, at Soul Motion Dance, and at the farmer's market, with dance friends, afterwards.. ; )

Blessings,

Scott.

mykil

11-03-2008, 01:56 PM

Hmmm soooo to blur ones boundaries you might be bored and in need of some new evolution, might be bored of the spirituality state ehh?<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
To warp you worry mind around a new boundary you might be in need of achieving something new such as??? Why would one warp their worry mind in such a way to need to present a new set of rules?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
Sometimes it would just be nice to know who’s coming and who’s going! Maybe we should all wear a sign?<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>

mykil

11-06-2008, 11:37 PM

nurturetruth

11-07-2008, 01:28 AM

MsTerry

11-07-2008, 06:32 AM

I think mykil is onto something, your boundaries only let you view the universe in 3D, while scientist are trying to prove it is actually in 5D.............................

.

I think it really depends on whether you are viewing it pre -1850 geometry of infinite 3D right-angle graph paper such as Newton or Descartes might have imagined----the Euclidean idea of space or not.

mykil

11-07-2008, 08:46 AM

nurturetruth

11-07-2008, 01:00 PM

shellebelle

11-07-2008, 01:06 PM

You don't get to live in my bubble! It's mine!! Alll mine!!

https://i354.photobucket.com/albums/r430/TaintedHalo007/fantasy-04.jpg (https://photobucket.com/images/fairy%20bubble)


WE live in a bubble this goes without saying.

hales

11-07-2008, 01:26 PM

mykil wrote: Well ya all. I am really surprised I cannot get more of a rise out of you all. It has really appeared to me over time that Boundaries are the most important aspect of the human nature. Not life, not breath, not even the food we eat can compare to the feelings we get with the boundaries we all remain focused on. Over and over people cannot seem to even emerge like they are infringing on a sacred vow. You read in the newspaper so poor soul is locked himself in his home surrounded by police just to protect his own personal boundaries. Nothing else just those boundaries! He is welling to shoot it out with the swat team all over a few boundaries. I am really interested in how he got there?

Scott:
An explanation for this territorial behavior is that someone is operating out of the primitive "old brain", or reptilian brain.. the part the act reflexively when threatened. Here is a simple diagram I found on google:

https://www.perceptions.couk.com/conscious.html

I think that we have to practice, practice, practice, to use the new part of our brains more and fall back on instincts and reflexes less. At least to engage the frontal lobes before "going medieval on someone's ass".. ; )
(pulp fiction quote, sorry..)

What spirituality and consciousness is, relative to the physical brain in a whole other discussion, but for me, it's just another perspective that is not exclusive to talking about the brain's functions.. then there is sociology, and psychology..
<o:p> </o:p>
M>The psyche is an amazing realm of existence and the things that go in under ones skin in the mind behind the scull is an amazing task at hand no doubt. But how does this stem out of pure frustrations and leave room to maneuver? On occasion it just does not leave room this goes without saying. Jealousies, that is a stern boundary for sure how can you break that boundary to let you loved one out in public without getting all I am going to kill that guy if he looks this way again! Oh we can’t go gay, hell let us not even let them kind get married for god sakes now there is a boundary that needs to be addressed! What are they afraid of???? Geezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!! LMAO!!!! Hell I marry you!!! Just out of spite. Oh is that setting a boundary? I love it when you are at someone’s house and make an offer of a piece of furniture and you get Oh I could never let that piece go I love it too much. And than Oh you would give me that much ehh OK! Sooo many boundaries, sooo little time. Focus people!

S; Like you said, Mykil, sometimes boundaries are good and necessary.. they form a safe "bubble" or shell during a sensitive phase.. some people never get to feeling safe enough to get out of a defensive mode. Maybe they need more love and support, not more "shoulds".. on the other hand, a good kick in the butt might be in order. (it's the Libra in me.. : )
<o:p> </o:p>
>Boundaries are the foundation of our universe it seems and this is where my mind starts to wonder. It has been said over and over that we are all just thought! Our limited intuitions and abilities to see further than we know how to [you know cause we are shallow] limits us to build the outer realms of our solar system, our own galaxy and our own universe. Our thoughts make up every thing we see. Our boundaries limit this all!

S: perhaps we need to go in phases of understanding, within the sphere of the "known", even if later it turns out to be incorrect, it's an operating way of being in the world, until our capacity to know reality is greater.

I'm not sure who said this, but it's an interesting (if metaphorical) example of what I'm sayin' here: "Rosa Parks sat so Martin Luther King,Jr. could walk, so Barack Obama could run, so America could fly.

M>If we are ever to evolve we need to see past our own noses, lose a few boundaries and grow! Imagination is what we consist of! If we limit our thoughts and lives we die! Plain and simple! I am never saying boundaries are bad, they are not. Evil and evil thoughts alone make the need for boundaries brought on by fear alone… but we still need to focus and build our own existence! WHAT?????[/quote]

I agree.. let's try to use our imaginations to create a greater life for all of us.. : )

Scott.

mykil

11-07-2008, 01:50 PM

I am not sure I understand? Are you saying we should all have really bad feelings and hold on to them and just go thru life depressed and unhappy? This is not denial it is stupidity!!! Plain and simple if you are living under a bridge and happy are you truly happy? If you are living in a multi million dollar house and really depressed what does that say about the person living under this bridge that is perfectly living in a really happy lifestyle? Is that person wrong for being happy! That would never be considered denial sweets EVER!!! Hmmmm if that person living in the big house on the hill could change their attitude towards life and feel blissful thoughts wouldn’t that be the ultimate reality? If you have a bad experience in life you can go thru this, but remember you have a need to let it pass. That is not denial that is reality! We all have an ex mate we have learned to hate! Would it not be a simpler possess to let the past go instead of saying I will never date another as long as I live, creating useless superficial boundaries out of pure heart break and anger and… hmmmmm DENIAL????? <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p> </o:p>
Time is in the mind ya I know, I have grown to accept that time continues to grows right along side of us all!! The actuality of time is really fascinating to me, it alwayz has been but now it really is going beyond the norm what they coming to in the new conclusions of the testing they are doing! Ten years a go every real scientist flat out said time travel was impossible, not ten years later, every scientists sayz out load and in public, it is only a matter of time…<o:p></o:p>

isn't this process called "Denial"? why would we only want to have good thoughts? :hmmm:

and i suppose the concept of "time" is your boundary, right?

; )

mykil

11-07-2008, 01:52 PM

Your bubble scares the hell out of me LADY!!!!

You don't get to live in my bubble! It's mine!! Alll mine!!

https://i354.photobucket.com/albums/r430/TaintedHalo007/fantasy-04.jpg (https://photobucket.com/images/fairy%20bubble)

shellebelle

11-07-2008, 03:07 PM

I wanna go to Harbin!

Your bubble scares the hell out of me LADY!!!!

hales

11-07-2008, 04:02 PM

Gravity; heavy topic, dude! ; )

> WE live in a bubble this goes without saying. Can you or may you tell me
why gravity is sooo weak? This has to do with 11 dimensions. By the time
the gravity gets to US it has to pass thru eleven separate dimensions and
this weakens the poor little gravity so it is just plausible enough to make
things work properly. How you ask? Scientists have been working on this new
theory for sometime, yet it is only a theory. At least they have
imagination and yes as of NOW we are living in a bubble. The universe is
just like a large bubble expanding and someday it will pop! Just theories
mind you from some extremely bright individuals with minds that have great
imaginations; there is no doubt about that! LOL!

S; It's funny, just last week (or thereabouts..) I had the idea of a
"bubble theory".. sort of in fun, ya know, string theory, big bang, etc..
why not bubble theory.. imagine the god(dess) sitting in field of grass and
wildflowers, blowing bubbles.. each one a universe..

>But there still is that theory that we all create our own universe around
us. Thought and thought alone makes up for everything you see hear smell
feel and..

If we are creating our own personal universe, of course it would be in some
kind of bubble-format.. right? The question is, how big is your bubble, how
pretty, how many other bubbles are included in your bubble? When you think of bubbles, you might think of a fragile, exclusive one, but consider
this.. a resilient, flexible, tough, yet semi-permeable bubble, that allows
in what you need and want, in order to survive and thrive. And, of course,
it lets out things that you no longer need or benefit from .

>If this is remotely true how does this affect us all? WE all have seen the
movie what the bleep, with the water bottles and the prayer? Yes thought
and thought alone does this! If you think bad thoughts the worlds becomes a
bad place. If you think good thoughts the world around us becomes a
wonderful place. This is proven again and again. If you do not believe this
than there may be no hope for you! You need to change your boundaries to
only include good thoughts in your mind. Oh I have to go. Look at the
TIME!!!!!

Telling someone they need to do something (even positive things) seems to
be akin to trying to catch a bubble someone else has blown..or at the other
extreme, poking it with a needle; very tricky to do without bursting that
bubble..
Believe me, I have lots of personal experience with well-intentioned
suggestions, and in the more distant past, barbed needle-pokes.. ; )

I think it's much better to observe and appreciate the diverse varieties of
bubbles people create.. the results are better.
At least that's my theory today!

Bubble on!

Scott.

mykil

11-07-2008, 04:29 PM

Hmmmm; I think you might have missed an important part of this theory. WE ARE ALL ONE!!! All the thoughts WE as a whole make up this universe is what I should have been getting at, not individually, but as a whole! This is our universe and it is what we think! I am getting to be a true believer in this theory as time grows by! AS far as telling anyone what to do why not! They can either take it wit ha grain of salt, or not or do what they will but an opinion, no matter how great or week, is a good thing! That is called communication and that is basically what this site and every aspect of the human language is all about ehh? LOL! PEACE!

Gravity; heavy topic, dude! ; )

> WE live in a bubble this goes without saying. Can you or may you tell me
why gravity is sooo weak? This has to do with 11 dimensions. By the time
the gravity gets to US it has to pass thru eleven separate dimensions and
this weakens the poor little gravity so it is just plausible enough to make
things work properly. How you ask? Scientists have been working on this new
theory for sometime, yet it is only a theory. At least they have
imagination and yes as of NOW we are living in a bubble. The universe is
just like a large bubble expanding and someday it will pop! Just theories
mind you from some extremely bright individuals with minds that have great
imaginations; there is no doubt about that! LOL!

S; It's funny, just last week (or thereabouts..) I had the idea of a
"bubble theory".. sort of in fun, ya know, string theory, big bang, etc..
why not bubble theory.. imagine the god(dess) sitting in field of grass and
wildflowers, blowing bubbles.. each one a universe..

>But there still is that theory that we all create our own universe around
us. Thought and thought alone makes up for everything you see hear smell
feel and..

If we are creating our own personal universe, of course it would be in some
kind of bubble-format.. right? The question is, how big is your bubble, how
pretty, how many other bubbles are included in your bubble? When you think of bubbles, you might think of a fragile, exclusive one, but consider
this.. a resilient, flexible, tough, yet semi-permeable bubble, that allows
in what you need and want, in order to survive and thrive. And, of course,
it lets out things that you no longer need or benefit from .

>If this is remotely true how does this affect us all? WE all have seen the
movie what the bleep, with the water bottles and the prayer? Yes thought
and thought alone does this! If you think bad thoughts the worlds becomes a
bad place. If you think good thoughts the world around us becomes a
wonderful place. This is proven again and again. If you do not believe this
than there may be no hope for you! You need to change your boundaries to
only include good thoughts in your mind. Oh I have to go. Look at the
TIME!!!!!

Telling someone they need to do something (even positive things) seems to
be akin to trying to catch a bubble someone else has blown..or at the other
extreme, poking it with a needle; very tricky to do without bursting that
bubble..
Believe me, I have lots of personal experience with well-intentioned
suggestions, and in the more distant past, barbed needle-pokes.. ; )

I think it's much better to observe and appreciate the diverse varieties of
bubbles people create.. the results are better.
At least that's my theory today!

Bubble on!

Scott.

NudeTea

11-07-2008, 04:40 PM

isn't this process called "Denial"? why would we only want to have good thoughts? :hmmm:

and i suppose the concept of "time" is your boundary, right?

; )

Ha Ha Haaaa Oh Kali this comment has me ROFLMAO !! It is SO you... !!!

Sylph

11-07-2008, 05:40 PM

This is very interesting and it's fun to try to stretch my mind around these concepts.

Mykil, I asked you for some concrete examples of how boundaries are limiting you or someone you know...
(Changing names or circumstances to protect privacy, etc, etc!)

Some boundaries are good and healthy, some crippling, I guess. The theoretical stuff is great, but I need 'stories'. How is spirituality erecting unhealthy boundaries? Specifically?

I like the analogy of bubbles that are porous, letting the healthy things in and the bad stuff out.

Another analogy is a cell, with a semipermeable membrane that is selective about what comes in and goes out. The cell is separate and distinct, but in numbers they make up the organism...
which is much more than a sum of it's parts.

hales

11-07-2008, 06:25 PM

Bubble theory.. : )

Scott.

hales

11-07-2008, 06:31 PM

Sylph.. the cell is the perfect example of of a semi-permeable "bubble".. really what I was thinking about. In fact, I think cellular environment, health, interaction, etc., is also a great metaphor for life.. oh, wait, it actually IS life! ; )

Scott.

I like the analogy of bubbles that are porous, letting the healthy things in and the bad stuff out.

Another analogy is a cell, with a semipermeable membrane that is selective about what comes in and goes out. The cell is separate and distinct, but in numbers they make up the organism...
which is much more than a sum of it's parts.[/quote]

mykil

11-07-2008, 06:32 PM

hales

11-07-2008, 06:40 PM

Of course, you can tell people what to do, but are you getting the results you want from that? Mabye, if what you want is getting the "rise" out of people that you mentioned, earlier? : ) When does someone say, "Oh, sure, right, I'll do that right now? ..I know it happens, but not as often as a vigorous "discussion".. Okay, yeah, why not go ahead, most of us are grown-ups.. ; )

btw, I like many of your theories and communications, even if I happen to take an opposite view.. like you (I think), sometimes a devil's advocate is needed to show different sides of an idea..

S.

mykil; Hmmmm; I think you might have missed an important part of this theory. WE ARE ALL ONE!!! All the thoughts WE as a whole make up this universe is what I should have been getting at, not individually, but as a whole! This is our universe and it is what we think! I am getting to be a true believer in this theory as time grows by! AS far as telling anyone what to do why not! They can either take it wit ha grain of salt, or not or do what they will but an opinion, no matter how great or week, is a good thing! That is called communication and that is basically what this site and every aspect of the human language is all about ehh? LOL! PEACE![/quote]

mykil

11-07-2008, 06:45 PM

MsTerry

11-07-2008, 10:10 PM

wow hales dude
you crossed my computer boundaries with that bubbly picture
can you fix that?

shellebelle

11-07-2008, 10:46 PM

https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60https://mail.google.com/mail/e/B60 <table style="color: rgb(102, 51, 0); background-color: rgb(255, 204, 153);" cellspacing="5"> <tbody><tr><td valign="top" nowrap="nowrap">Main Entry:</td> <td>boundary</td></tr> <tr> <td valign="top" nowrap="nowrap">Part of Speech:</td> <td>noun</td></tr> <tr> <td valign="top">Definition:</td> <td>outer limit</td></tr> <tr> <td valign="top">Synonyms:</td> <td> abuttals, ambit (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/ambit), barrier (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/barrier), beginning (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/beginning), border (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/border), borderland, borderline (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/borderline), bounds, brink (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/brink), circumference (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/circumference), circumscription, compass (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/compass), confines (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/confines), edge (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/edge), end (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/end), environs (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/environs), extent (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/extent), extremity (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/extremity), frame (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/frame), fringe (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/fringe), frontier (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/frontier), hem (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/hem), horizon (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/horizon), limits, line (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/line), line of demarcation, march (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/march), margin (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/margin), mark (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/mark), mere (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/mere), mete (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/mete), outline (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/outline), outpost (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/outpost), pale (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/pale), perimeter (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/perimeter), periphery (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/periphery), precinct (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/precinct), purlieus, radius (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/radius), rim (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/rim), side (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/side), skirt (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/skirt), terminal (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/terminal), termination (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/termination), terminus, verge (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/verge) </td></tr></tbody></table>
Horizon has special symbolism to me.

When I did Horizon I got
<table style="color: rgb(102, 51, 0); background-color: rgb(255, 204, 153);" cellspacing="5"><tbody><tr><td valign="top" nowrap="nowrap">Main Entry:</td> <td>horizon</td></tr> <tr> <td valign="top" nowrap="nowrap">Part of Speech:</td> <td>noun</td></tr> <tr> <td valign="top">Definition:</td> <td>skyline, extent</td></tr> <tr> <td valign="top">Synonyms:</td> <td> border (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/border), boundary (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/boundary), compass (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/compass), field of vision (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/field%20of%20vision), ken (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/ken), limit (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/limit), perspective (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/perspective), prospect (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/prospect), purview, range (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/range), reach (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/reach), realm (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/realm), scope (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/scope), sphere (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/sphere), stretch (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/stretch), vista (https://thesaurus.reference.com//browse/vista) </td></tr></tbody></table>
Now this intrigued me due to perspective.

So horizon and perspective are both bundary. So when we get a perspective we find the edges, the boundary and the horizon! INTERESTING!!!!! We also reach, have range, a frontier and an outpost.

All this was very intriguing.

From a girl who has long stated she does not fit in a box but loves her bubble. Boxes are square and confining with sharp edges. Bubbles are soft, iridescent and able to expand and contract as the moment requires, desires of just because.

mykil

11-08-2008, 06:22 PM

MsTerry

11-08-2008, 09:12 PM

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjcoRFcmQuo&feature=related

mykil

11-10-2008, 09:26 AM

How do you ask may my boundaries differ form your? Well let me tell ya! Last night I was in the warm pool with about fifty other people all nude up at <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:City w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Harbin</st1:place></st1:City>. Now I am not gay or homophobic. My boundaries differ in this one way for yours. Anyone In that pool could have floated over and given me a hug, I would have accepted this with open arms. Now have I tried to give anyone of those other people a hug, what do you think might have happened? LOL!!! It is the boundaries that are really getting in the way of this world evolving let me tell ya something right now!
<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
Now what is it? If I walked up and patted you on the ass, you would go ballistic? Why all the turmoil in ones life over such a simple jester? Where did you acquire such a boundary and don’t you think it is a little overkill? What on this big blue earth happed along the way that a simple jester of a remotely hello happed to you? Even the fucking dogs walk around sniffing each others asssss for god sakes! You’d think that the world had come to an end from this little run in with some crazy dude that wanted to give you a hug! And it would not stop there. For the rest on the day you would call all of your friends and tell them all about some sicko that accosted you and had his hands all over you and that you were thinking of calling the cops and… You would never let this go ever!!!! Every time a someone approached you, you would ask yourself if he was going to want to give you a hug and you would turn and run away! ROTFLMFAO!!!
<o:p></o:p>
About fifteen years ago I was in the store buy9ng a beer, this really attractive woman that was working construction came it with her boss and was also buying a beer. We made eye contacts and had a few words. She was playing the part for sure. When she turned and walked away she grabbed my asss and just kept walking! This shocked me a tad bit I was impressed. I am pretty sure I was grinning from ear to ear. I turned and watched as she paid for her beer and out the door she went! Now I know I have a really cute asss but WTF??? I still think about that experience every once in a whole and still get that smile… Vent for the day on boundaries!
<o:p></o:p>

hales

11-10-2008, 01:28 PM

Sorry, Ms. T, et al..
I think the moderator took care of it..
Scott.

shellebelle

11-10-2008, 01:32 PM

Hmmm I was laughing. I was in that pool and I did swim up and grab Mykil's ass. Yep that was fun! And nope the world didn't end. He just turned to see who it was and went back to enjoying the space he was in.

How do you ask may my boundaries differ form your? Well let me tell ya! Last night I was in the warm pool with about fifty other people all nude up at <st1:city w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Harbin</st1:place></st1:city>. Now I am not gay or homophobic. My boundaries differ in this one way for yours. Anyone In that pool could have floated over and given me a hug, I would have accepted this with open arms. Now have I tried to give anyone of those other people a hug, what do you think might have happened? LOL!!! It is the boundaries that are really getting in the way of this world evolving let me tell ya something right now!
<o:p></o:p>
Now what is it? If I walked up and patted you on the ass, you would go ballistic? Why all the turmoil in ones life over such a simple jester? Where did you acquire such a boundary and don’t you think it is a little overkill? What on this big blue earth happed along the way that a simple jester of a remotely hello happed to you? Even the fucking dogs walk around sniffing each others asssss for god sakes! You’d think that the world had come to an end from this little run in with some crazy dude that wanted to give you a hug! And it would not stop there. For the rest on the day you would call all of your friends and tell them all about some sicko that accosted you and had his hands all over you and that you were thinking of calling the cops and… You would never let this go ever!!!! Every time a someone approached you, you would ask yourself if he was going to want to give you a hug and you would turn and run away! ROTFLMFAO!!!
<o:p></o:p>
About fifteen years ago I was in the store buy9ng a beer, this really attractive woman that was working construction came it with her boss and was also buying a beer. We made eye contacts and had a few words. She was playing the part for sure. When she turned and walked away she grabbed my asss and just kept walking! This shocked me a tad bit I was impressed. I am pretty sure I was grinning from ear to ear. I turned and watched as she paid for her beer and out the door she went! Now I know I have a really cute asss but WTF??? I still think about that experience every once in a whole and still get that smile… Vent for the day on boundaries!
<o:p></o:p>

hales

11-10-2008, 01:42 PM

If anyone is interested in who made that bubble image.. (sorry bout the huge size; I believe it's been removed), it came from here:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/ch_p/collections/

There are a lot of fractal images on there.

He is a French artist, named C.H. phillipe, (?) at least that's what it says on his profile on Flickr.

"Bubble Boy".

hales

11-10-2008, 01:54 PM

In case people are still interested in this topic, I have to say that for me, boundaries are a matter of professionalism. I'm a massage therapist in a large, (expensive/conservative) private health club in San Francisco. Each person I work on has his or her own sense of boundaries. (yeah, it's a sense of boundaries, not necessarily something that people have full awareness of, or a clear knowledge of, but believe me, people KNOW when their personal boundaries are crossed, whether they tell you about it or not. Not only that, but what they say may not be how they feel, or they may feel different about it in the future. I have two friends (yes, they were male) who lost there jobs after "misunderstanding" what clients' boundaries were. Also, the cultural norms for body boundaries seem to have changes a lot since the late seventies, when I started doing bodywork, to no, post-sexual revolution, post-women's lib, post-aids epidemic, and post neo-conservatism, or whatever era we're in, now. Kinda feels like there is a general tension and stress around bodies, compared to when I was growing up. Y'all up in Sebastopol seem to live in a bubble (there's that word again!), of that kind of 60s-70s openness, it seems like. Even East County Sonoma seems a lot more up-tight.

Comments?
Scott aka Bubble Boy

Sylph

11-10-2008, 02:41 PM

Mykil, did you ask for a hug?
I imagine that the boundaries are different when one is naked in a public setting. You might give your pals a big close hug when clothed but it must be different without 'insulation' and wet, besides!

A pat on the butt has some negative connotations for most women. It's an infringement on a boundary for sure! I wonder how most men would feel about a strange woman touching them like that?

Scott, I totally understand about the very sensitive boundaries involved when you work with a client. I'm 'hands-on' in my work, too. Communication is key. Communication and respect.

In case anyone missed this...here is a guy who is offering 'free hugs'. Simple but radical.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4

mykil

11-10-2008, 04:55 PM

here is Bubble Boy's picture I trimed a tad... right out of James Bond. Sooo frigging Seventies eh???
https://home.comcast.net/~junknjewels/images/bubbleboy.jpg

MsTerry

11-10-2008, 06:34 PM

Wow man, remember those moving ink bubble slides?
Or was that the sixties?

here is Bubble Boy's picture I trimed a tad... right out of James Bond. Sooo frigging Seventies eh???
https://home.comcast.net/%7Ejunknjewels/images/bubbleboy.jpg

MsTerry

11-11-2008, 11:31 AM

my understanding of massage persons is that they want to have boundaries for themselves, as to not suck up too much energy from the other person.

In case people are still interested in this topic, I have to say that for me, boundaries are a matter of professionalism. I'm a massage therapist in a large, (expensive/conservative) private health club in San Francisco. Each person I work on has his or her own sense of boundaries. (yeah, it's a sense of boundaries, not necessarily something that people have full awareness of, or a clear knowledge of, but believe me, people KNOW when their personal boundaries are crossed, whether they tell you about it or not. Not only that, but what they say may not be how they feel, or they may feel different about it in the future. I have two friends (yes, they were male) who lost there jobs after "misunderstanding" what clients' boundaries were. Also, the cultural norms for body boundaries seem to have changes a lot since the late seventies, when I started doing bodywork, to no, post-sexual revolution, post-women's lib, post-aids epidemic, and post neo-conservatism, or whatever era we're in, now. Kinda feels like there is a general tension and stress around bodies, compared to when I was growing up. Y'all up in Sebastopol seem to live in a bubble (there's that word again!), of that kind of 60s-70s openness, it seems like. Even East County Sonoma seems a lot more up-tight.

Comments?
Scott aka Bubble Boy

mykil

11-11-2008, 01:10 PM

My understandings are that it is not so much a boundary issue that massage therapists are afraid of. It is more of energy issue. They do not want to take anyone else’s pains on. AS in sympathy of another type. When peeps come in to get massages they have everyday issues on top of stress build up in their systems that tends to try and lash onto the massage therapist when they relies this energy ya? You know when you take on someone else’s pain you take it ON! All of that pain becomes yours. Massage therapists seem to have a hard time with this on occasion. Not taking in someone else’s pain could be a wonderful lesson to all of us in this day and age.
<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
It is not just the massage therapists that this occurs with, everyone in everyday life presumes to take on others negative energy and this is where the lines get a little fussy! Allot of boundaries are created out of fear from this exact sediment. People need to learn to release the energy flow and not let it into their body or mind or soul. When you acquire any kind of energy you store it in you bode, your muscles your shoulders you legs you belly you feet. Every aspect of you body absorbs this energy and stores in the form in was receive. Bad energy, good energy, It is in us all. Just like a battery storing energy you body is doing the same thing. When you get a bad sort of vibe, learning to release this is a wonderful task!
<o:p></o:p>
I have been studying this for some time and have come to a few conclusions. This may sound far fetched to some yet really relative to others, in the fact that I believe our own DNA produces an energy vibe that is transferable. When we touch smell or even hear. There is energy in the air. Not really a pheromone, but a true relic of energy our body is transmitting outward into the world. When you run into a bad situation, you make boundaries. Well when someone comes along and has a similar DNA response or output radio frequency you just clam up and want to turn and run from that energy. It is strange not to understand why you want to run, or are aggravated or down right turned on. It is an energy field we all have and share and use to our own survival. Our DNA has a direct connection to our true spirituality; this goes without saying, boundaries also. Boundaries seem to be built around our own energy fields! I love to feel energy and sort out all he bad from the good. Although Lately I have been taking on more than
I can chew, I still love to be able to try and make people see the light and come around. More difficult than said this goes without saying, yet it is alwayz nice to try and do the right thing!!!!
<o:p></o:p>
One of the biggest saying on earth you hear over and over again is the oceanographers saying why are we going out into space and exploring when most of our own oceans on earth have not been explored. WE have been hearing this quote for years by many. Why on earth are we not putting more energy into exploring the human bode?

Sara S

11-12-2008, 07:02 AM

Well, but one doesn't have to necessarily hold on to these negative energies!

In Tibetan Buddhism we do a practice called Taking and Sending (Tong Len) in which we deliberately take on all the negativities of other people, breathe them in, and, when they hit the intense white light in our hearts, change them into white, positive light, which we then breathe out to those people.

Great practitioners (Bodhisattvas) take on all of the pains and negativities of everyone else in the world, and vow not to remain in nirvana after death, but to be reborn as many times as it takes, until everyone can get there. This total unselfishness is one of the major things that attracted me to this spiritual path; I sort of see it as the antithesis of the attitude I see in many religions of "I'm going to heaven and you're not, unless you do it my way."

Sara S.

My understandings are that it is not so much a boundary issue that massage therapists are afraid of. It is more of energy issue. They do not want to take anyone else’s pains on. AS in sympathy of another type. When peeps come in to get massages they have everyday issues on top of stress build up in their systems that tends to try and lash onto the massage therapist when they relies this energy ya? You know when you take on someone else’s pain you take it ON! All of that pain becomes yours. Massage therapists seem to have a hard time with this on occasion. Not taking in someone else’s pain could be a wonderful lesson to all of us in this day and age.
<o:p></o:p>
It is not just the massage therapists that this occurs with, everyone in everyday life presumes to take on others negative energy and this is where the lines get a little fussy! Allot of boundaries are created out of fear from this exact sediment. People need to learn to release the energy flow and not let it into their body or mind or soul. When you acquire any kind of energy you store it in you bode, your muscles your shoulders you legs you belly you feet. Every aspect of you body absorbs this energy and stores in the form in was receive. Bad energy, good energy, It is in us all. Just like a battery storing energy you body is doing the same thing. When you get a bad sort of vibe, learning to release this is a wonderful task!
<o:p></o:p>
I have been studying this for some time and have come to a few conclusions. This may sound far fetched to some yet really relative to others, in the fact that I believe our own DNA produces an energy vibe that is transferable. When we touch smell or even hear. There is energy in the air. Not really a pheromone, but a true relic of energy our body is transmitting outward into the world. When you run into a bad situation, you make boundaries. Well when someone comes along and has a similar DNA response or output radio frequency you just clam up and want to turn and run from that energy. It is strange not to understand why you want to run, or are aggravated or down right turned on. It is an energy field we all have and share and use to our own survival. Our DNA has a direct connection to our true spirituality; this goes without saying, boundaries also. Boundaries seem to be built around our own energy fields! I love to feel energy and sort out all he bad from the good. Although Lately I have been taking on more than
I can chew, I still love to be able to try and make people see the light and come around. More difficult than said this goes without saying, yet it is alwayz nice to try and do the right thing!!!!
<o:p></o:p>
One of the biggest saying on earth you hear over and over again is the oceanographers saying why are we going out into space and exploring when most of our own oceans on earth have not been explored. WE have been hearing this quote for years by many. Why on earth are we not putting more energy into exploring the human bode?

podfish

11-12-2008, 08:46 AM

just to go all James Randi on you, :): how can you find any evidence that your DNA's involved here? I can't imagine how I'd be able to tell what my DNA's up to, myself....
nice philosophy, though - I just think it's not usually helpful to try to tie it into a physical cause like that.

I have been studying this for some time and have come to a few conclusions. This may sound far fetched to some yet really relative to others, in the fact that I believe our own DNA produces an energy vibe that is transferable. When we touch smell or even hear. There is energy in the air. Not really a pheromone, but a true relic of energy our body is transmitting outward into the world. When you run into a bad situation, you make boundaries. Well when someone comes along and has a similar DNA response or output radio frequency you just clam up and want to turn and run from that energy. It is strange not to understand why you want to run, or are aggravated or down right turned on. It is an energy field we all have and share and use to our own survival.

mykil

11-12-2008, 10:10 AM

OH MY GOD! You probably do not belive in ghosts, gods, or that we are all one either eh? LMAO!!!

just to go all James Randi on you, :): how can you find any evidence that your DNA's involved here? I can't imagine how I'd be able to tell what my DNA's up to, myself....
nice philosophy, though - I just think it's not usually helpful to try to tie it into a physical cause like that.

alanora

11-12-2008, 01:22 PM

Are boundaries always shifting?

OH MY GOD! You probably do not belive in ghosts, gods, or that we are all one either eh? LMAO!!!

shellebelle

11-12-2008, 01:28 PM

I think they are if we are in growth.

On the other hand if our boundaries aren't shifting are we experiencing growth? Are we stagnate and stunted?

I have met many people who never expand themselves or their boundaries - they are not very interesting and in many ways growth has stopped.

Are boundaries always shifting?

mykil

11-12-2008, 03:33 PM

Are boundaries always shifting?

\
I would hope so! When you walk out of your house you see or do or even smell or hear something that has change on your life. At that moment in time you have evolved! There for your spirituality has either grown or dimensioned based on what you saw heard felt or did. Most on the time you have has personal growth, there for your boundaries have shifted toward evolution and enlightenment. EVERYDAY! If something frightens you and you go into recluse mode I think you have lost a little something, yet it is change and you have just put up new or reinstalled the old boundaries you adhere to ya?
<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
I have a lot of respect for people that face their fears head on. I have a problem with this particular evolution on occasion, and find myself avoiding certain fears. I should just meet them head on and evolve all at once. Metamorphous to speak and just move past certain boundary issues that I can’t seem to overcome due to fear it self! I used to have a fear of traveling over bridges when I was young. Strange but true! I had a really hard time driving over the bridge-haven bridge when it was first renewed in like 78. I remember well. It was the new bridge that scared me, not the old one that was replaced. Yet over time I got over it and have no issues with it what so ever now. The same thing happened with the new dam at warm springs, when it was filling full of water and I was downstream during the 86’ flood. It scared the hell out of me just knowing it was filling up for the first time! I finally got over that issue too! I am alwayz trying to move forward in this day and age and try not to take those steps backwards in time. But either way it is a definite change and you yourself change on a n never ending evolutionary chain of events that is a constant, that is for sure!

mykil

11-12-2008, 03:44 PM

Hey Pod<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe we are an energy force not to be reckoned with!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe that after our physical body dies our energy remains in tact.<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe that our DNA is alive and is linked to every man woman and baby on this earth and maybe even beyond, also maybe even linked to every aspect of this little blue planet we are attached to at the hip! I have been thinking about this for way more than twenty years and have a strong belief system installed in my quest for evolution and spirituality!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe if you are a skeptic there is nothing I can do to change your mind! <o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe that in the next fifty years or so you will get your proof!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe that I can say PEACE and be happy with this statement in this day and age! I think we should print this on every piece of media and receipt and install it on every piece of email we send in this world today to try and achieve such a thing. And evolve to those standards!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
Sooo PEACE!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>

just to go all James Randi on you, :): how can you find any evidence that your DNA's involved here? I can't imagine how I'd be able to tell what my DNA's up to, myself....
nice philosophy, though - I just think it's not usually helpful to try to tie it into a physical cause like that.

shellebelle

11-12-2008, 03:46 PM

Ahhh this may explain AMY! :puteranger:

<o:p></o:p>
I have a lot of respect for people that face their fears head on. I have a problem with this particular evolution on occasion, and find myself avoiding certain fears. I should just meet them head on and evolve all at once. Metamorphous to speak and just move past certain boundary issues that I can’t seem to overcome due to fear it self!

mykil

11-12-2008, 03:48 PM

AMY WHO?

Sylph

11-12-2008, 05:11 PM

Mykil wrote:

I have a very close friend that I have known for about 8 or nine years. She belongs to a cult, well a religious spiritual movement that has its own set of standards in life. Their beliefs are so so in my book. Although she has been doing this for years before I have met her I have pushed her boundaries to the limits. It her quest for spirituality she has had to give up sooo much. No meat. No sex. No anything. They have to meditate for a minimum of two hours a day every morning, everything is just way beyond the norm. Their quest is not come back to this planet when their bodies expire. All new found boundaries that she has to deal with for the rest of her life. The only way she can have sex is when she is married. Now I have known her for like ever, and have pushed this boundary as far as one can with the line getting a little shady! Enough said? True life boundaries, all in the name of spirituality, yes? I do have varying artifacts of true life adventures that go hand in had with spirituality all wrapped up in my head. Tons if not every aspect of the true meanings of making new found boundaries. To me this is simple. Yet I can understand that ones true simplicity is another true challenge in life. The verses I have in my head are really from one realm to the next. One end of the spectrum all the way to the next. There are no limits to how these two do end up in harmonious everlasting friendships. The true calling of the spirituality goes hand in hand with boundaries for sure!

So here is this lady with 'spiritual' boundaries that you think are holding her back from true fulfillment or happiness. Is she happy? vegetarianism and all that meditating and avoiding sex apart from a committed relationship isn't going to hurt her or stunt her personal growth, in my opinion!
But, it kind of sounds like a lot of hard work to be so perfect and 'spiritual' that she will get what she perceives as the optimum afterlife! I think that is a recipe for misery, but that's just skeptical me...Are you trying to say that 'life is a banquet, why is she subsisting on crumbs?' If that is your point, I agree whole-heartedly! I don't want to judge her choices, though, because maybe this structure works for her, somehow.

Sylph

11-12-2008, 05:32 PM

Shelley:
I have met many people who never expand themselves or their boundaries - they are not very interesting and in many ways growth has stopped.

Some people decide they are 'old' at 40 or 50 and kind of give up on life. Or they have wounds from childhood that keep them from venturing out to have new experiences.
A friend and I were discussing this over lunch today. We were talking about several elderly people we know who are still vibrant, fun and enjoying life. They never stop learning, evolving and pushing their own boundaries. At a party over the weekend I met a middle-aged lady who took up running in the last year or so and completed a marathon. These people are inspiring!

hales

11-12-2008, 09:06 PM

Ms. Terry wrote: my understanding of massage persons is that they want to have boundaries for themselves, as to not suck up too much energy from the other person.

Scott:
I do not generally buy into the idea of "sucking up negative energy" from clients, however, it's important to be "grounded" and neutral while working with others, in my experience. I was taught to be "like an empty straw" and allow energy to pass through me, which seems to work. (allowing energy to flow to the client from the universe, as well as any negative or unwanted energy from the client. I guess being grounded, neutral and non-resistant, could be another kind of boundary.. or is it that "semi-permeable membrane; allowing only that which is beneficial to pass in and out?

I was referring to the fact, (what I observe as true, anyway); that peoples' comfort level (during a massage), varies due to a number of factors, the practitioner may or may not be aware of. Some people are very comfortable with their own bodies and not very concerned about being fully draped, etc., while others are nervous about being touched in general, or do not feel very comfortable in a less-than-fully-dressed state. Factors that may come into play include cultural influences, childhood or relationship traumas, etc. So.. we have to be very sensitive to the client and respond to subtle or over cues about how comfortable the client is, even if they do not express how they are feeling.. even after being asked! Being a male massage practitioner is harder in this regard, I think, as in general, more men and women feel comfortable with a female therapist, (more non-threatening), even though there are many excellent, respectful and considerate male massage therapists. (of course there are both men and women who have other ideas about boundaries!)

I have had at least two separate experiences of being refused employment as a massage therapist because I am male! This was told to me at the time I applied, which is funny because I understand that the person hiring needs to hire the most "qualified" person, but it is illegal to discriminate on the basis of sex! (I have 28 years of experience at making a living as a massage therapist, and have never been fired from a job. I've had my current job for 18 years.)

In my own opinion, there has been a cultural pendulum swing, since the uninhibited 60s, with it's freedom and excesses, til now, with much more awareness, and what I would call "hypervigilance", ie: highly energized boundaries for many people. Also, IMO, some folks are actually deprived of intimacy and contact that they might benefit from, or enjoy, because of fear or defensiveness due to some bad experiences they have had in the past, or fear of the possibility of those things happening. When I work on women now, I leave the room while they undress, and wait for them to be fully draped before entering the room. They remain draped during the massage, except for the part of the body being massaged. (I don't work on the "chest area", much lower than the collar bone, and usually don't work on the abdomen. The gray area for me is working on the "hips" and doing range of motion stretches.. I think it's great work, doing deep massage around the hip bones and gluteal muscles, stretching the legs in full range of motion, but it's all a bit much for some people.. so I'm considering not doing it with people who seem a bit nervous, inhibited or tense.. or on the first massage, at least, even though I think it's very therapeutic, it's a bit "activating" for people with anxiety about boundaries, sex-related PTSD, etc.

I work in a pretty controlled environment, currently, and it's become much more controlled with recent management changes and with fears of liability and "complications", due to the kind of work I do. (they do not really trust the practitioners to have good boundaries. Possibly there is some basis for this according to anecdotal evidence in the industry literature, about lawsuits and liability issues.) I'm not even allowed to trade massage with fellow massage therapists or give massage to other employees, where I work.
I find this very frustrating, actually. My bosses could REALLY USE A MASSAGE! But most of the new management doesn't even understand why people get them.. they are quite an anxious bunch, IMO. Why do I stay there, you may well ask.. mostly job security, autonomy and full benefits. I also like my clients and some of my coworkers. At least on a good day.. ; )

Okay, I'm getting a little sleepy and have to sign off, now..

Scott.

Sylph

11-13-2008, 08:21 AM

I truly believe we are an energy force not to be reckoned with!<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
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I truly believe that after our physical body dies our energy remains in tact.<o:p></o:p>
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I truly believe that our DNA is alive and is linked to every man woman and baby on this earth and maybe even beyond, also maybe even linked to every aspect of this little blue planet we are attached to at the hip! I have been thinking about this for way more than twenty years and have a strong belief system installed in my quest for evolution and spirituality!<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe if you are a skeptic there is nothing I can do to change your mind! <o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
I truly believe that in the next fifty years or so you will get your proof!<o:p></o:p>
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I truly believe that I can say PEACE and be happy with this statement in this day and age!

I truly believe that a quest to be a spiritual being is programmed into our DNA. I was programmed to be a skeptic(I have the wrong VMAT2 gene), and unless something amazing happens, I will probably stay that way! But, I do believe we are "All One" in a sense with our fellow humans and the creatures on this planet.
Proof in fifty years, Mykil? OK, I'm writing a note to myself....I'll check back with you on that.

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/08/14/choosing-your-religion_n_118907.html (https://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/08/14/choosing-your-religion_n_118907.html)
The God Gene
It turns out that spirituality seekers probably carry--embedded in our DNA along with the gene that determines whether we can roll our tongues and all the others that make us not only human but unique individuals--a particular version of a gene called VMAT2. Genes come in different flavors, which is why all of us have colored irises but some are brown and others blue or green. The VMAT2 gene comes in two forms--one of which, it seems, makes people more likely to seek out transcendent experiences (Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia doesn't count). Some call it the "God gene."
The link between VMAT2 and spirituality is the discovery of Dean Hamer, Ph.D., a geneticist at the National Cancer Institute in Bethesda, Maryland, who came upon the microscopic miracle worker quite unexpectedly. Hamer's job is to track down the links
between behavior, personality, and the risk for diseases such as cancer and AIDS. One of his recent projects was to study the genetic basis of cigarette addiction. He gave some college students a personality test called the Temperament and Character Inventory. Then he took blood samples from the students and analyzed their DNA. His conclusion: There may well be a gene that makes some people more prone to getting hooked on smoking
But not long after Hamer finished that study, he ran into the psychiatrist who'd designed the personality test, Robert Cloninger, M.D., of Washington University in St. Louis. In casual conversation, Dr. Cloninger made a comment that caught Hamer's attention. "He said, 'More people pray every day than have sex,'" Hamer recalls. (It's true: Surveys show that 59 percent of Americans have a daily prayer habit, while only 5 percent can say the same for nooky.) Hamer was intrigued. The sex drive is our most bottom-line biological urge--without it, we wouldn't be here. So if people pray more than they get laid, does that mean that religion could be just as basic a human need?
Conveniently, the personality test he'd given the college students contained questions designed to measure "self transcendence"--that is, the ability to get lost in an experience and feel connected to something larger. Hamer looked again at the DNA samples and the questionnaires and found that the most spiritual people tended to have a particular version of VMAT2. Why? Hamer has a theory. VMAT2 controls feel-good brain chemicals, such as serotonin and dopamine, which keep us upbeat and motivated to seek out pleasure, like from coconut panna cotta and back rubs. Hamer thinks this same family of chemicals may also prime us for religious experiences--their levels fly off the charts when people take hallucinogenic drugs like LSD or Ecstasy. So, Hamer reasons, maybe people with the spiritual version of VMAT2 are feeling a natural form of that out-of-this-world high

Sylph

11-13-2008, 03:50 PM

In my own opinion, there has been a cultural pendulum swing, since the uninhibited 60s, with it's freedom and excesses, til now, with much more awareness, and what I would call "hypervigilance", ie: highly energized boundaries for many people. Also, IMO, some folks are actually deprived of intimacy and contact that they might benefit from, or enjoy, because of fear or defensiveness due to some bad experiences they have had in the past, or fear of the possibility of those things happening. When I work on women now, I leave the room while they undress, and wait for them to be fully draped before entering the room. They remain draped during the massage, except for the part of the body being massaged. (I don't work on the "chest area", much lower than the collar bone, and usually don't work on the abdomen. The gray area for me is working on the "hips" and doing range of motion stretches.. I think it's great work, doing deep massage around the hip bones and gluteal muscles, stretching the legs in full range of motion, but it's all a bit much for some people.. so I'm considering not doing it with people who seem a bit nervous, inhibited or tense.. or on the first massage, at least, even though I think it's very therapeutic, it's a bit "activating" for people with anxiety about boundaries, sex-related PTSD, etc.

Hi Scott, I wonder what makes us so hyper-sensitive to touch from a professional masseuse...which should be a really safe, nurturing thing?
Is it partly that our environments are so crowded and noisy with other humans? We want to keep our bubbles intact! Are we trained to be 'in touch' by cell phone or computer...too cerebral? Have we forgotten how nice it is to be touched? Is touch given a sexual connotation too often?
Or we have been made so aware of 'inappropriate' touch that we are super vigilant and nervous...as you suggest. Too bad for us all!
With my last massage, I had that deep massage and stretching of the hips and it was wonderful! With the draping and explanations of what he was about to do, I was pretty comfortable, even though it was my first massage like that...actually my first massage by a man!

Thanks for your interesting insights!

mykil

11-15-2008, 06:20 PM

Sooo n with the show…
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Is pressing ones boundaries good for the soul? I do this often; you might even say I do this for a living! I love to press one to the point that they actually verbally have to say “STOP ALREADY”!!!
Most do this with a smile on their face and love the attention, yet others are flabbergasted or blow over with just pure anxiety while others might be nauseated or repulsed to the point that they never ever want to be in the same room with me ever again! Did I do something wrong? This question ponders ones brain. Well my brain, to the point that I really am curious about the outcome of an event that I set up or choreographed to make one really look deep into their own soul. How did this pushing of the boundary hold up when they are just not in the mood to take any ones bull? Now you might ask “why the hell do you even want to do such a thing”? My answer would be why the hell not? PUSHING these boundaries is just a joy and a relished event that I can do over and over and… But what about the outcome?
<o:p> </o:p>
You know I have made more friends pushing these boundaries than doing anything else I have ever done. The really bright ones are right there laughing with me and really just in envy and awe over what I tried to pull on them. TO my amazement there really are a large group of people in the area with large IQ’S! Most of these people are just like me and want to have a little fun in life, and for me to try and get past their own set securities is a true pleasure and a blast!
<o:p> </o:p>
What about the ones that do not get it? Hmm good question! What about those poor souls that have had a life changing experience for the worst? Was it for the worst or did it do them some good? Did I miss judge that much and push them into reclusive darkness for all eternity? I think not! For the most part they held their ground, although maybe repulsed and outraged, I think it actually makes them feel good about themselves. I truly think that in most cases people walk away feeling they are better than me and how dare I and boy I showed him and really just can fell a wondrous sensation that although they do get repulsed still it has made their day, week, or even year!
<o:p> </o:p>
Can anyone here place reference on a situation when someone pushed their boundaries sooo much it changed their life for the better?

pjpete

11-16-2008, 08:40 AM

Well, your bubble needs bursting, because living in a fantasy just doesn't make it.

mykil

11-16-2008, 09:21 AM

Fairly Vague... Ill bite... why would you assume I am living in a bubble besides the theory that the universe is a giant bubble? And if I am living in a bubble why would you assume this be a bad thing???? Everyone lives is a bubble no???!!!

Well, your bubble needs bursting, because living in a fantasy just doesn't make it.

mykil

11-16-2008, 03:37 PM

Well I have gotten a few private responses to my last post claiming it was very negative and not very appropriate to say the least! Now I might agree to some extent, but all-in-all what exactly did I say? How did that get to you and what boundaries did I push to let that fear rush into you heart and make you jump on the defense such as that? How on this earth do you know what boundaries I am talking about? What ones I am pushing to the limits and why does it matter so much? Are you that intuitive that you know exactly what I am referring to? Or did that yonder psyche catch up with you and have a field day listing you worst fears as the boundaries I was referring to? LMAO!!!! This is amusing! If I set off too many scenarios in your heads maybe just turn and walk away form the computer and do not read anymore! That was surely jesting for that last part from my point of view! If you were truly offended you might truly want to lye down meditate and try to climb on into someone else’s bubble and see what they are seeing! IT is simple really, try and see thru the eyes of one of your closest friends, see what boundaries they are adhering to and give peace a chance! Seeing past ones own self would be considered spiritual growth and being able to get out on past your own psyche might not be a bad start! I know I am going to try this right now! If I am looking thru your eyes what will I see? What will I have to endure day in and day out just to keep sane? Will there be a test every night when I get home? Will I have to reflect on every word spoken to a near by stranger that I passed in the street? Will I not calm myself down till I have reflected on the whole day and then finally be able to relax after say an hour and a half or sooo? When I am peeking into your world will I be ashamed or depressed or truly happy and enlightened? Maybe overwhelmed with fears of anxiety and vanity? Maybe I will see the TV! Please look thru my eyes and tell me what you see!!! :hmmm:<o:p></o:p>

mykil

11-25-2008, 01:26 PM

As I am sitting here at my desk I am watching a fly on my monitor. The fly in outside in the bay amusing itself on my little video camera I have set up to watch the people drive on in.. I have been watching it for about five minutes now and am wondering what it is doing. Is the camera throwing off some sort of heat? Really this is truly reviling, being the observer and really getting a close up look the little fellow is different to say the least, you can almost make out if it is a boy or a girl this is how close and large it is projecting itself on my screen!
<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
Bing the observer is really sometimes the best way to challenge ones mind, imagination and wit. Asking questions and then sitting back and letting the information flow freely in whichever direction it might enter, throwing off the energy to put thought into such a reflection pattern in general. Everyone in life has an opinion of some sort, from the rush song way back in time [I would tell you which album but them you would truly know my background] even if you choose not to make a decision you still have made your choice! The point being is that I am fond of getting to the bottom of things and finding out what people truly think about certain topics. Sometimes I am aware I do not ask the right questions {DAM FLYS ANYWAYZ} but none the less I do admire all the responses I get to the continual questions I do ask! To idle ones mind day in and day out is a task that is best to simple tasks. Not for the drama enriched souls that have a tendency to indulge and feed upon the relentless task of gaining on the endless baggage they adhere to day in and day out without ever consciously wondering what about the baggage they already have and are not letting go offfffff!!!! Ohhhh off on a little tangent about the ex!!!!!!!!!!!! But truly there are questions to be concerned about our everyday life that need some sort of exceptions meet that we did not receive or inherit with our genes when we were born! Setting boundaries has fascinates me for the last few years yet I have yet to build from this too much. I have made some severe boundaries for myself that I think are wonderful! I have not smoked or drank alcohol sine new years two thousand, I have not even eaten fish in god knows how long I think it has been about four years now! So these are true boundaries I have met the challenge on and have not let myself slide even a little, really never having any desires to actually, but it goes without saying I have made strong and secure boundaries to go the distance.
<o:p></o:p>
So the question still remains to me now are:
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What is an unhealthy boundary?
<o:p></o:p>
Now that CC has brought a new addition to my attention, what is an artificial boundary?
<o:p></o:p>
What might be the best way to recognize an unhealthy boundary?
<o:p></o:p>
In ones own words what is he most common reason for building a boundary? Besides meeting me in person and having to go change your whole world to become a shut in of course?
<o:p></o:p>
What is your most prestige boundary and why has it evolved to such?
<o:p></o:p>
What boundaries do you think we were actually born with?
<o:p></o:p>
I want to observe!!!!! Lets all observe!!!
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wunda

11-25-2008, 02:58 PM

Gee i was born in a family that had little concern about boundaries... as i got older i found that i set lots and lots of boundaries as a way of rebelling against what i saw as a lack of concern for themselves and those they were responsible for.

As to unhealthy boundaries. Those arise out of fear. They can be identified by outsiders as having no logical value, except to exert some control over something or someone. Unhealthy boundaries interfere with the free exchange of love, and protect no one.

As i got a bit older, i saw the headache, heartache and missed opportunities that came from having rigid, plutonium alloy boundaries. And with help, i lowered my defenses and allowed some love in my life, and felt safe with vulnerability. Of course this came with new costs, new challenges and new rewards.

For now, my most prestigious boundary is one i set with myself. I insist on stretching my comfort zone trying new things, learning about new ideas and experiences. Of course, I still have a cautious curiosity and sometimes that means it takes me awhile to get to places that others go easily. But, I allow myself to be open to possiblities... and sometimes those possiblities turn out to be delicious adventures.

So, I see that there have been relatively few people who were willing discuss specifics in Mykil's threads. Come on now! You can hide behind your wacco screen names and still be honest. Its a relatively safe boundary yes?

<?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:office" /><o:p></o:p>
So the question still remains to me now are:
<o:p></o:p>
What is an unhealthy boundary?
<o:p></o:p>
Now that CC has brought a new addition to my attention, what is an artificial boundary?
<o:p></o:p>
What might be the best way to recognize an unhealthy boundary?
<o:p></o:p>
In ones own words what is he most common reason for building a boundary? Besides meeting me in person and having to go change your whole world to become a shut in of course?
<o:p></o:p>
What is your most prestige boundary and why has it evolved to such?
<o:p></o:p>
What boundaries do you think we were actually born with?
<o:p></o:p>
I want to observe!!!!! Lets all observe!!!
<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>
<o:p></o:p>

MsTerry

11-25-2008, 04:17 PM

I am worried about that new toy of Mykil
He once again has crossed my boundaries with that camera.
He is turning into one big paranoid snoop.
I ain't shopping there anymore, he already welched me out of a clock, and now this!

So, I see that there have been relatively few people who were willing discuss specifics in Mykil's threads. Come on now! You can hide behind your wacco screen names and still be honest. Its a relatively safe boundary yes?

mykil

11-25-2008, 05:17 PM

Here; P P sent me this I think it might have soemthing to do with PUSHING THE WRONG BUTTON ONCE AGAIN!!!! It really cracked me up!!!

Discussing boundaries, wow, I wish I had a camera that was giving off that kind of warmth, wherein I would be able to tell if the littlest of creatures were male or female. And yes, everyone in life, and most-likely thereafter, has an opinion with regards to every and anything. What topic exactly are we discussing? And man, there are not that many cars that come in and out of that parking lot, are there? As to questions, there is a "don't ask, don't tell," policy in-place, that has cramped the life styles of many in America. Baggage, there is always baggage, expensive baggage, Tumi, Gucci, Louie Vutton, Dunhill, and the like. Then there are the more reasonably priced pieces, I don't even remember their names. Genes, I like Genes by Mark Ecko, Juciy, and Seven's, and of course Levi, they stand the test of time, unlike some inherited genes, that seem to fall apart after years of abuse. While I don't partake in eating fish very often, either. I do think that if one eats the right type of fish, Salmon, Albacore Tuna, and deep ocean Cod, that it is most-likely very good of us. the Eskimos have very healthy hearts because of these fish, so scientists say. Who really knows though. Now smoking cigs, is a very different problem. There should be very strong boundaries with regards to smoking cigs. It's some very deadly stuff. Artificial boundaries, those are ones one puts in place when they badly want that other guy or gal that is so sexy, but threatening, that one does not know what to do for weeks at a time. When in reality, one should just go for it....:) Shut in, is not a boundary I would like to enact, or even inherit, or take up because of influences from others. That would not be a very good boundary, now would it? My greatest boundary is one that is self preservative, all assuming, and fun, living, laughing, and knowing those like individuals who got it going on...:)