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  1. TopTop #1

    Gentlemen's Quiz

    1. In the company of feminists, coitus should be referred to as:
    a) Lovemaking
    b) Screwing
    c) The pigskin bus pulling into tuna town

    2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you’ve both shared:
    a) Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship
    b) Your blood-test results
    c) Five tequila slammers

    3. You time your orgasm so that:
    a) Your partner climaxes first
    b) You both climax simultaneously
    c) You don’t miss Sports Center (Sky)

    4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
    a) Healthy, creative love-play
    b) Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would ever agree to
    c) Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need ever find out about

    5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you’ve just had sex with is:
    a) The best part of the experience
    b) The second best part of the experience
    c) $100 extra

    6. Your girlfriend says she’s gained five pounds in weight in the last month. You tell her that it is:
    a) Not a concern of yours
    b) Not a problem - she can join your gym
    c) A conservative estimate

    7. You think today’s sensitive, caring man is:
    a) A myth
    b) An oxymoron
    c) A moron

    8. Foreplay is to sex as:
    a) Appetizer is to entrée
    b) Priming is to painting
    c) A queue is to an amusement park ride

    9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
    a) "I hope we can still be friends."
    b) "I’m not in right now. Please leave a message after the tone...."
    c) "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You."

    10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
    a) Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy
    b) Is uptight and a waste of time
    c) Shouldn’t have sat next to you on the bus in the first place

    ---
    If you answered ‘A’ more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really are a man.
    If you answered ‘B’ more than 7 times, check into therapy, you’re still a little confused.
    If you answered ‘C’ more than 7 times, call me up. Let’s go drinking.
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  3. TopTop #2
    mulhouse3's Avatar
    mulhouse3
     

    Re: Gentlemen's Quiz

    Your survey was pretty good, but the c answers were dumb or something like, the too obvious choice if I am an immature man at 36 and can only think of one thing at a time, either football (all through the year) or sex (with a superbeautiful woman who comes on to me). As a middleage man I was hoping to see some subtle wit, not just silly jokes.
    But thanks for trying...
    Tomg
    Quote auroramagiceyes wrote: View Post
    1. In the company of feminists, coitus should be referred to as:
    a) Lovemaking
    b) Screwing
    c) The pigskin bus pulling into tuna town

    2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you’ve both shared:
    a) Your views about what you expect from a sexual relationship
    b) Your blood-test results
    c) Five tequila slammers

    3. You time your orgasm so that:
    a) Your partner climaxes first
    b) You both climax simultaneously
    c) You don’t miss Sports Center (Sky)

    4. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
    a) Healthy, creative love-play
    b) Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend would ever agree to
    c) Not the sort of thing your wife/girlfriend need ever find out about

    5. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you’ve just had sex with is:
    a) The best part of the experience
    b) The second best part of the experience
    c) $100 extra

    6. Your girlfriend says she’s gained five pounds in weight in the last month. You tell her that it is:
    a) Not a concern of yours
    b) Not a problem - she can join your gym
    c) A conservative estimate

    7. You think today’s sensitive, caring man is:
    a) A myth
    b) An oxymoron
    c) A moron

    8. Foreplay is to sex as:
    a) Appetizer is to entrée
    b) Priming is to painting
    c) A queue is to an amusement park ride

    9. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying at the end of a relationship?
    a) "I hope we can still be friends."
    b) "I’m not in right now. Please leave a message after the tone...."
    c) "Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You."

    10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
    a) Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of intimacy
    b) Is uptight and a waste of time
    c) Shouldn’t have sat next to you on the bus in the first place

    ---
    If you answered ‘A’ more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you really are a man.
    If you answered ‘B’ more than 7 times, check into therapy, you’re still a little confused.
    If you answered ‘C’ more than 7 times, call me up. Let’s go drinking.
    | Login or Register (free) to reply publicly or privately   Email

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