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  1. TopTop #1
    Sara S's Avatar
    Sara S
    Auntie Wacco

    Neologism Contest Winners!

    Once again, The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words.


    And the winners are:

    1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

    2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

    3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

    4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

    5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

    6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

    7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

    8. Gargoyle (n), olive-flavored mouthwash.

    9. Flatulence (n.) emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

    10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

    11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

    12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists..

    13. Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.

    14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

    15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

    16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.
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  2. TopTop #2
    sd gross's Avatar
    sd gross
     

    Re: Neologism Contest Winners!

    I had no idea they were called Neologisms, and I always hear about these contests after they're over.
    My list (I called it my "Dogboy Dictionary")follows:

    scruples Tablets that make you feel sexy.
    puberty.....a very smelly chicken
    pheremones....sounds Tinkerbell makes while communing with Pan's peter
    ice water ....what happens when you slice onions
    gubernatorial.....a born-again peanut
    Last edited by sd gross; 11-14-2009 at 11:14 AM. Reason: graphic
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