amazin grace

[babaruss]

Another sparrow died today, not long ago it would have been an insignificant occurrence.A ragged, stiff, bundle of feathers, to be removed fromthe bottom of a cage and nothing more.I had no connection with birds then, no involvement,no reasons for caring one way, or another.Funny how caring works, needing an investment first;as a reason to love. Wonder where I learned suchthinking, and will I learn a better way.One lone sparrow lingers, where once 50 lived.The game of life has it’s own rules, dealing upthe strangest hands. Spared from euthanization,to die a more lingering death. I’m sure there’s anotherlesson there, but I’d rather give the ‘teacher’ a pieceof my mind. And learn of kinder subject matter later on.Little time is spent for mourning today, more for reflectionthan any thing else.Asking myself questions: What could I have done different. What, if anything did I miss. Am I responsible for all of this? Calming myself, remembering; that there is no need forblame, especially not for forces beyond my control.Sitting again on my back steps, seeking focus, (clarity if you will). A whirl of feathers drops to my knee, as eveningdraws near. I know this little Mourning Dove...how appropriate that this should be the one to now appear.She was among the babies that we cared for, and released earlier this year. I recognize the jagged part in her feathers just above her right eye.I stepped on her one morning in the aviary, hadn’t seen hertiny form nestled in the straw just inside the door.She almost died from that careless act, and yet, this most forgiving bird is here, now comforting me. AmazingGrace visits me again...I feel privileged, (and so relieved).The light starts to fade, and as quickly as she apeared, shedeparts, flying up into the darkened foliage of a large bay tree.Perhaps I’ll never quite understand this life I live.Or ever become fully accepting that, I am but a witnessto a great unfolding.Nor, become completely open to receiving the miracles it has to give.But I’m willing to try."