The following are two 'poems' I entered in a Cowboy Poetry Contest. Inexplicably, they didn't win.
(Get along little doggerel)
I hope you enjoy them!
The Old Double Raisin
by Stephen D. Gross
The Old Double Raisin
Out West of Napa
in the Land of the Zinfandel
I got in on the crush
it was always a rush
and I sure punched my ticket to Hell
I behaved like a child
when the spirit was wild
in roadhouses with lights all aglow
Then I got in it deep
fell in love with a sheep
that little ewe could even brew Joe
she had a cute wooly ass
and we both loved grass
she grazed and I raised it for smokin'
she'd stay home and knit
and keep the home fires lit
turn out sweaters while I sat there tokin'
One day she met Sam'
He was a Merino ram
he had four legs and I couldn't do better
His curved horns were buff
and I'd sit there and puff
watch my sweetie turn out a new sweater
It had four holes not three
(Sam had more legs than me)
Liked to butt, and I liked to wrassle
and one day a new lamb
(he looked just like Sam)
and of course they named the kid Ba-a-asil
They left the next day
My blue skies turned to gray
all alone with plenty of nothin'
except a heart full of pain
and a lanolin stain -
Would you like to come by for some mutton?
BELLA
by Stephen D. Gross
I married Bella on the 6th day of June
but she left in October when the harvest was nigh
Took her saddle, her colt
her grandma's silver spoon
Left me my bottle, my half-pint of Rye
On its stalks the corn withered
the wheat died in the field
The pole beans and broccoli
matured, went to seed
My poor heart was broken
and my twisted mind reeled
I drank myself blind
I could no longer read
I stumbled outside
the door hung by its hinges
Dragged myself 'cross the yard
My parched brain was French-fried
found the rotten storm door
that led down the root cellar
its bulb dim and yellow,
as the cold daylight died
I screamed Bella's name
while the fruit jars all dusty
shook on the shelves
Fred the Hound, sadly bayed
I reached through the shadows
my fingers touched buttons
and keys - the accordion Bella had played!
In a rush my head filled
with airs melancholy
La Paloma, Dark Eyes
Underneath Paris Skies
"O Solo Mio", I whispered
all hollow and empty
The Blue Danube fell,
a waterfall, from my eyes
Then a dark form obscured
the streaming light from the doorway
A gush of wind- a sudden rush
something swept me aside
It swooped like a bat
like Hades at midnight
fell upon the trusty Hohner
saddled up
commenced to ride
She played San Antone Rose
with fingers so nimble
they flew like crazed banshees
through the damp cellar air
Then Beer Barrel Polka
and I knew in a flash
twas my long-lost Bella
who it was standing there
She was back from the swamps
the Gulf towns and Bayous
the stark chapparel and agave fields
from the pawn shops that lined
the back streets of Nogales
and Alamo mission
where the bells always peal
"Are you staying?" I asked her
"Are you kidding?" she answered
she played Caro Nome, and
Addio Napoli
She gave me a hug
and ran out the door
"I'll be back in a second - I just have to pee!"
I waited ten minutes
I waited an hour
the long night passed
and she never returned
I took that old Hohner
my stomach turned sour
and my sobs turned to tears
as that old squeeze box burned
Now out in the desert
where the stars, ghostly glowin'
illuminate mesas where the coyotes sing
and the whipoorwill's call
echoes down the canyon
stand the cows, softly lowin'
while their bells jing-a-ling
In the still night I hear now
a faint tarantella
or a sensuous tango
or a zydeco tune
and the horned owl's hoot
sounds so broken hearted
The only song that he knows -
Bella's Gone to the Moon