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  1. TopTop #1
    Shandi's Avatar

    Who's interested in creating conscious shared housing?

    As I read posts about rents going up, sometimes several times in under 2 years, forcing some into facing the worst case scenario of homelessness, I'm compelled to reach out.

    My focus is on those who, like myself, have no family support, no friends who can share their homes, no groups to network with on a personal basis, and not enough income to qualify even for a share rental with strangers.

    In the past 10 years I've lived in Sonoma County, I've shared living with some very unbalanced people. Each time, in desperation to find a way of escape, I've gone from the frying pan into the fire. A room in someone's house is much more complicated than we realize. The best part is shelter from the elements. The worst part is living with substance abuse and rage, directed at the house mate. One of my landlords said "I hate people!". Another one stole things from my room when I was gone. And yet another, who professes "non-violent communication" dominates, by raising his voice, and threatening eviction when asked for reimbursement of household expenses. He even goes as far to say that my asking how to handle household expenses is a "threat" to him.

    My dream goal is to connect with conscious, kindred spirits who have a desire to create shared housing. I've done this before, when I had the funds and a good salary to secure a large house. Mostly, they were women's houses, but I'm not opposed to living with men.

    A few months ago, I started a network for Senior Women Sharing Housing. I developed a questionnaire to determine mutuality, and put the results in a spreadsheet. Although I wanted to have a meeting, no one could agree on a date and time. I've offered individual support to a few of the women. but it fell short of my ultimate goal of facilitating personal connections for the potential of sharing housing.

    Now, I'm at another level, and ready to step into the next phase. I'm thinking of starting a Meet Up for "Conscious Shared Housing Network". Their may be a better name for it, but this identifies what it is. I'm curious about who's willing to participate by meeting face to face, sharing what we want/need, our non-negotiables, and what we offer.

    If anyone would like to share leadership, ideas, suggestions, please contact me at [email protected]
    Otherwise, sharing comments here may benefit others in our general community.
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  3. TopTop #2
    Glia's Avatar

    Re: Who's interested in creating conscious shared housing?

    This is a dandy idea, and the need for such "non-traditional" (or socialized, depending on your POV) solutions is growing by the day. Kudos for taking this on!You might do better with using an Internet presence and related community-building tools to generate interest and a viable, active group, then move to in-person presentations and such down the line. can be a useful tool; however, it does get rather expensive and all the contact info belongs to them. My two cents: steer clear of it and use other resources.
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  5. TopTop #3

    Re: Who's interested in creating conscious shared housing?

    hi, All,

    Great post on WACCOBB and I am interested, but not ready, yet. I lived in Sonoma County for about 15 years, but had to move to Missouri to help my mom, where I still am. She's 88, so....

    When I leave here, I'd like to return to Sonoma County, if it's still there (FIRES!?!?!). Please keep me posted/on your list, or add me to your MeetUp (I use [email protected] for MeetUp groups) so I can stay in touch and then let you all know when I'm ready to return and see what's going on with your peeps.

    About me: I'm a long-time meditator (since 1972) and plan to do a modified Buddhist mostly silent retreat (perhaps for 3+ years) when I leave here. My teacher lives in Inverness (Lama Drimed, in case you've heard of him).

    I swim laps for about an hour almost daily and love swimming outside, year-round, which is one reason I'd like to come back to that part of CA. I love lakes, but pools are fine.

    I would want somewhere to live that is free or that I could afford (paying $400/month or less for rent/utilities). I would not do much talking or interacting within the home (a separate cottage/granny unit would be ideal).

    I would rather not have to share food or meals because of my mostly silent retreat set-up, unless that was unavoidable. I am not nor do I want to be a vegetarian, but I do eat organically and healthfully.

    No smoking, no drugs, no drinking and do not want to be around those who do these things, especially the smoking (a deal-breaker).

    I do not have pets and cannot live with carpeted homes and shedding pets very happily, but as long as they stay out of my bedroom, I can cope. I love gardens, but physically can't do much besides harvest at this point.

    I have lived collectively most of my life (over 30 years), so have tons of experiences and know the gamut, as you described. I am not looking to house with those in desperate need or with serious mental health or addiction problems, although I do recognize the need to house these people, surely. I have put in my time, so to speak, with those and need to do my retreat at this stage of my life (66, now). I do not need or expect silence around me, but loud music/parties/TV, etc., many times per week or every night/day are not workable. Children are great to live with. People noise, working /machines and nature sounds are all fine.

    I have a doctorate and worked most of my professional life in education and nonprofits, with a lot of experience in communication, therapy groups, and the arts as well. Probably not working for the rest of this life, though, or not any time soon. I'm also a writer/editor, but, again, focusing on retreat when I get to CA, so not doing those at that point, either.

    I am an anti-racist, feminist, socialist, lefty/hippie and would not live with Trumpers, racists, anti-Semites, "patriots" who hate immigrants, or misogynists (I'm assuming you would not, either, but just in case...).

    I have one adult child; he and his wife live in Seattle.

    You can find out more about me from my website ( or Facebook (Sally Sue Fleischmann Ember, there).

    I don't know, yet, when I'm available to return, but I hope to hear from you.

    Best to you. Stay cool, stay healthy,
    Last edited by Barry; 09-07-2020 at 01:05 PM.
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