I only recently joined Wacco and just now found the Conscious Relationship page. I liked your question and want to answer.
Here's my response: As I am more mature, I have learned discernment regarding attractiveness. Today I am aware of when there is a coherent resonance between my heart chakra and the woman's. As a psychotherapist, I am aware that technology exists (HeartMath) to measure coherent resonance. I can feel that resonance in myself and between myself and others. It has a unique signature of physical sensations. Coherent heart chakra resonance is an essential component of attraction. Everything else will follow.
A person with a coherently resonating heart chakra will be more likely to (these are some other qualities) be fun (creative, spontaneous, playful), like herself, be willing to give and receive equally in relationship, be available for emotional and spiritual intimacy, have a spiritual practice, like to dance, be ecologically aware, be self-aware, be in tune with her body, and love nature.
These are the qualities that would attract me to a woman. These are also my qualities. I am new to the community and single. I'm interested in your suggestions for how I can attract someone to me and my qualities.
Regards,
John Omaha
03-10-2010, 01:03 AM
covelojoe
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Just saw this thread here and figured I'd drop in the mix. This should help me some actually to spell it out.
I like to be around strong/centered, and creative women with a lively and positive outlook on life. Someone who is genuine, forthright and says what they really feel and think. I also like athletic/healthy women so we would be able to enjoy the wilderness, hiking, camping etc. Cuddling/snuggling is key for me too. Also someone with a lot of real compassion for our fellow humans.:thumbsup:
Just saw this thread here and figured I'd drop in the mix. This should help me some actually to spell it out.
I like to be around strong/centered, and creative women with a lively and positive outlook on life. Someone who is genuine, forthright and says what they really feel and think. I also like athletic/healthy women so we would be able to enjoy the wilderness, hiking, camping etc. Cuddling/snuggling is key for me too. Also someone with a lot of real compassion for our fellow humans.:thumbsup:
That's good stuff,but as I start dating and working on my own self I realize what I really want in a woman.As I start to be responsible for my own well-being and my own emotional state--I want a woman who does the same and will support me in this growth.I will support her in her own process.She never has to pay"a price"for being herself. Jason
03-28-2010, 12:53 AM
NorseViking869
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
I was actually going to start a new thread about what it is I seek in a relationship and what my ideal woman would be.However, since this is about sharing the truth, I felt that this might be the best place for it. After all your original question is about attraction and what would make me ask someone out as opposed to just staying home and watching tv with my dog.
I really do not believe in a specific type of person as the perfect match, but I have come to realize what seems to be the most harmonious and healthy type of person for me.
She has to be strong and witty. I do prefer some one a little more earthy and granola. Someone who is ok with a man who is sensitive. A woman who is Pagan or Atheist but definitely not Judeo/Christian. You have to be comfortable with a Nihilist/existentialist as I am very accepting of Pagans. Partaking of the sacred herb is very welcome indeed or at least tolerance to my intake. I would love to be with a hippy mama with dreads and loves patchouli, but that is not at all a requirement. I like colorful people who march to the beat of a different drum. I enjoy talking to the dreamers and dream makers of the world as they are my kindred spirits. People who look at the glass as half full, yet strive to fill it up the rest of the way. Definitely left of center politically, even if we have opposing viewpoints on the issues we support. In fact, I would love someone I can debate one moment and totally agree with the other. Of course, and this goes without saying, someone who is not scared of intimacy and sensuality.
There you have it. That is my Story (and my truth) and I am sticking to it.
03-29-2010, 07:56 AM
csell
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
As a match.com success story, could I add a few comments (even though I'm female)?
You are on the right track...telling the truth is paramount. Most men in my age bracket lie about their height by 1" (if they are under 5'-10"), their income by $25-50K, and their age by 3-to-10 years.
There are a lot of us aging hippie mamas out there, and most of us prefer to be in solid, monogamous relationships rather than single. Most of us mingle with the earth, and while we don't mind mud on our feet, we like to clean up well. Most of us tolerate (or partake in) herbal pleasures, although I'd give anything for my husband to stink less (he made me quit smoking for the same reason). Most of us have thrown over our Judeo-Christian backgrounds for less structured belief systems. Most of us are left-of-center, colorful, artistic folks. [Yes, I know "most" is pushing the envelope and I can't speak for everyone].
Kudos for not looking for a "type"! Keep your eyes open but most importantly, use your other sense too. The qualities you look for may not be visible to the eye.
Thanks--Carolyn
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by NorseViking869:
I was actually going to start a new thread about what it is I seek in a relationship and what my ideal woman would be.However, since this is about sharing the truth, I felt that this might be the best place for it. After all your original question is about attraction and what would make me ask someone out as opposed to just staying home and watching tv with my dog.
I really do not believe in a specific type of person as the perfect match, but I have come to realize what seems to be the most harmonious and healthy type of person for me.
She has to be strong and witty. I do prefer some one a little more earthy and granola. Someone who is ok with a man who is sensitive. A woman who is Pagan or Atheist but definitely not Judeo/Christian. You have to be comfortable with a Nihilist/existentialist as I am very accepting of Pagans. Partaking of the sacred herb is very welcome indeed or at least tolerance to my intake. I would love to be with a hippy mama with dreads and loves patchouli, but that is not at all a requirement. I like colorful people who march to the beat of a different drum. I enjoy talking to the dreamers and dream makers of the world as they are my kindred spirits. People who look at the glass as half full, yet strive to fill it up the rest of the way. Definitely left of center politically, even if we have opposing viewpoints on the issues we support. In fact, I would love someone I can debate one moment and totally agree with the other. Of course, and this goes without saying, someone who is not scared of intimacy and sensuality.
There you have it. That is my Story (and my truth) and I am sticking to it.
03-29-2010, 12:37 PM
Andy3
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
I don't pay a lot of attention to looks. I insist on clean but that is as far as I go. I was attracted to my first wife because of her smile, her ability to laugh and to look at her glass as being half full and not half empty. We married young and were together for only 15 years before she passed away from a horrible disease.
After her death I was not looking for another relationship but was working with a woman that had these same qualities. We became good friends and eventually married. We are still together and happy after 26 years.
Outer beauty is a temporary thing. Inner beauty lasts forever. I would prefer to have a life companion with inner beauty than a miserable person that looks beautiful at one point in time.
07-04-2010, 03:59 PM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
I have browsed through this thread and can see nothing edifying in 99 percent of the remarks, even those by males who purportedly like women.
Part of the original question asked whether skinny women were approachable romantically. (My paraphrase.) So, I expected some talk of appearance, but this whole focus on superficial looks and the instant gratification kind of sex leaves me less than ambivalent.
Honesty was asked for and it is hard for me to believe that this is it?! Is there nothing more in the male brain?
Do you not realize that the best sex with a woman will always be when that woman feels that she is completely loved? Why do many men think that all women have some kind of agenda?
Here's another question: Which males in the room would be friends with a female if they knew ahead of time that no sex would be involved -- ever?
07-04-2010, 04:50 PM
mykil
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
That is a no brainer love, depends on the woman and how I myself would get along with said woman!
07-04-2010, 04:57 PM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Okay...how would you know whether you would get along with said woman just by looking at her? Wouldn't you have to befriend her in order to get to know her? I kinda don't get it.
07-04-2010, 06:50 PM
mykil
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Let’s have coffee, I will tell you within the first five minutes weather I wanna do you, just be friends, or maybe just go our own ways!
07-04-2010, 07:34 PM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
I think not. Your presuppositions are showing. For example: I would never say to a man "Let's go to coffee so I can judge whether I want to "do" you (within the first 5 minutes!)" Ha ha ha! No self-respecting person of either sex would agree to that.
Plus, I expect the reason you go on these forums is recreational, that you never say anything serious, you like being the devil's advocate and you're probably too scared to meet any woman for coffee, because they are all smarter than you, for the reason that the small head is the one doing all the talking. Still want to meet me for coffee?
07-04-2010, 09:18 PM
kburgess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
I have browsed through this thread and can see nothing edifying in 99 percent of the remarks, even those by males who purportedly like women.
Part of the original question asked whether skinny women were approachable romantically. (My paraphrase.) So, I expected some talk of appearance, but this whole focus on superficial looks and the instant gratification kind of sex leaves me less than ambivalent.
Honesty was asked for and it is hard for me to believe that this is it?! Is there nothing more in the male brain?
Do you not realize that the best sex with a woman will always be when that woman feels that she is completely loved? Why do many men think that all women have some kind of agenda?
Here's another question: Which males in the room would be friends with a female if they knew ahead of time that no sex would be involved -- ever?
For me the best part of any interaction with a woman is finding that true softness in the heart. Unfortunately many of us have gotten a bit jaded with life, or had other issues impact our ability to truly feel what is right inside of another. I find that women are generally much better at the feeling side, but can get a bit lost with it at times, and men are better at the pragmatic side, but can get lost in that arena as well. Consequently we make a very good pair.
The beauty is that I generally trust a womans sense me through radar since I feel your ability to know through intuition is more acute than mine, and I know that if you are attracted to me, things will work, and if not, there is not much I can do to change that. I can just be me, and make sure that I show up in all the ways that count, and see what works.
I feel that most women will do just about anything for a man they really care about, and will be patient beyond what is normally considered reasonable.
I have also found your care to include me with kindness is far beyond what could be normally expected.
All this is a statement of reverence and appreciation, since it is not about men choosing anything. We are not wired to make any real selection on anything. Biology has the guys put on the display, and the girls select the best for their particular needs, and any guy with a half a brain will easily realize that you cant pull off a lot of bs with a woman for very long, she will find out, and if she trusts herself, will head for the hills. If she doesn't, she may stick around until exhaustion takes over, and is forced to leave.
This is not a good way to run the game. If you like us, you will make our lives into heaven, and if you do not, and we are all honest with each other, you will probably let us down easy, and even help us along in the process.
Do I know for sure, not a chance, but for the occasional instances that I have seen/experienced this, I have been placed in awe.
We are here to serve each other in different and complimentary ways, and it has nothing to do with physical anything, but feeling a quality that is beyond words. A quality that says I want more, and it is irreverent on what we are doing, but I just want to be with you because I like you no matter what we are doing.
Obviously the attraction to sex if seen as an end will always be doomed to failure and a demonstration of stupidity, while a development of true care, affection and love is far beyond what sex could ever offer.
If we both choose to come from the same place of honesty, working together, finding agreement, and wanting to work for the long term, there is not much to go wrong. If you are not working for that get out of the game.
It is the woman's responsibility to choose since it is your biology that carries the responsibility and fruit of life, and also that you can perceive many dimensions greater of relational subtlety of what will truly allow any partnership to be a success. It is the depth of looking at a black and white snapshot in the dark, vs a true real life flesh and blood experience. We just do not see the same depth or understanding as you, and so I gladly return to you what you can naturally do so exceedingly well.
As for skinny, and just friends, its all in the eyes, and if you are healthy, strong, and hold the gaze to me, I just smile and say yes.
Much care,
Ken.
07-05-2010, 09:52 PM
Mrs. Wacco
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
Do you not realize that the best sex with a woman will always be when that woman feels that she is completely loved? Why do many men think that all women have some kind of agenda?
Because they DO! Women want to be loved and adored and partnered, especially if sex is involved. To your own words, the best sex "will always be" if the woman feels completely loved. That is not an agenda?
And your words suppose that you can't have great sex if you're not completely loved? Hogwash!! I wish women would give up their agendas of sex has to equal love and learn to have no agenda or expectation and just enjoy themselves. It's very freeing!
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
Here's another question: Which males in the room would be friends with a female if they knew ahead of time that no sex would be involved -- ever?
Plenty - I have had and have many men friends who by their choice are my friend and no sex is involved. I also know other women with men friends and no sex is involved. Broaden your horizons.
07-06-2010, 08:38 AM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Mrs. Wacco:
Because they DO! Women want to be loved and adored and partnered, especially if sex is involved. To your own words, the best sex "will always be" if the woman feels completely loved. That is not an agenda?
And your words suppose that you can't have great sex if you're not completely loved? Hogwash!! I wish women would give up their agendas of sex has to equal love and learn to have no agenda or expectation and just enjoy themselves. It's very freeing!
Plenty - I have had and have many men friends who by their choice are my friend and no sex is involved. I also know other women with men friends and no sex is involved. Broaden your horizons.
I have probably just not met the right partner yet. Most were not interested in finding out what I like. I am not really so unusual.
Communication is a huge turn on for me.The sex would have gone off the scale (for them as well) if my partners would have been interested in pleasing me in this one way. Alas, these moments of bliss were few and far between.
My former partners were satisfied with hurried, superficial sex that just is not multi-dimensional, or satisfying enough for me. When someone won't communicate, they are leaving out a huge part of sex. Most people leave out another huge part of sex -- laughing.
I do have male friends. Most of my male friends are former partners. The others are friends from childhood.
I will take your advice and broaden my horizons.
07-06-2010, 09:59 AM
Thad
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
here's a bit
If you want to have a spiritual experience pick the right partner
If you want to have even more of a spiritual experience
pick the wrong partner
All the instant gratification one has come to expect from our gizmo society with the disposable tag
leave people out in left field looking for something that only comes through as a fringe benefit,
If you look good enough to have sex with it doesn't matter the rest for a moment, if your looking for a life partner, a mate, a father/mother for your children your looking for all the rest of it too, social coherence, position, options, conversational skills, inclusion, if your looking for security, you may not be looking for any of the above,
try it on see if its ready fit, toss it out if its to much trouble to be tailor fit, try on something else, after all its a disposable society
If life was more tribal then how someone fits in and melds with ones others lets more interaction and light into the dark places and there's work to be done with others while your observing an interest out of the corner of your eye to see how they are with others. With more time for inspection and talents for modifications its a wonder how many rise before you with qualities you never would have suspected as you zoomed outward in your never ending quest to find the right one.
07-06-2010, 11:05 AM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
If you want to have even more of a spiritual experience
pick the wrong partner
I get what you mean, and I should probably be the most spiritual person in the world by now..but it would help to meet a person who also sees even disagreement as an opportunity.
Quote:
If life was more tribal then how someone fits in and melds with ones others lets more interaction and light into the dark places and there's work to be done with others while your observing an interest out of the corner of your eye to see how they are with others. With more time for inspection and talents for modifications its a wonder how many rise before you with qualities you never would have suspected as you zoomed outward in your never ending quest to find the right one.
I see how being more tribal-oriented could help in that regard.
I mostly just want good sex and good communication. I really do not have a never ending quest for the right one. There are most likely many right ones. Timing may be key here.
Important: Communication. Chemistry. Health. Compassion. Feeling passionate about your role in the universe. The ability to have sex. (Otherwise why not just be friends?) Paying attention to one person at a time (serial monogamy) I'm not a great multi-tasker in that regard.
Things that don't matter: societal ideas of attractiveness, age, hair length, style of dress, political beliefs, religious, beliefs, material possessions, marriage, living together.
It's also important not to assume anything about your partner based on their gender.
Hope this helps increase the benefits of this discussion. I know it is helping me, in particular.
07-06-2010, 12:02 PM
Braggi
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
... I see how being more tribal-oriented could help in that regard.
I mostly just want good sex and good communication. ... There are most likely many right ones. Timing may be key here.
Important: Communication. Chemistry. Health. Compassion. Feeling passionate about your role in the universe. The ability to have sex. (Otherwise why not just be friends?) Paying attention to one person at a time (serial monogamy) I'm not a great multi-tasker in that regard.
Things that don't matter: societal ideas of attractiveness, age, hair length, style of dress, political beliefs, religious, beliefs, material possessions, marriage, living together. ...
You're making some good points here. I would add that "societal ideas of attractiveness" fits your argument if you're looking at Cosmo magazine and other almost completely artificial markers of beauty, however, there are some "true" indicators of outward beauty that appear universal, and these are supported by evolutionary theory. Humans "should" be beautiful, and most of us actually are. I think improving genetics creates more beautiful people over time. There are so many beautiful people who are not "classic" beauties, and this enriches the gene pool all that much more. If you morph the faces of 1,000 people (almost any people) you'll wind up with a classic beauty. I think the intent of Nature is that we all become beautiful and that children should nearly always be more beautiful than their parents.
My personal theory is that individual genetic development proceeds in an optimal way if the mother is well cared for, well loved, and is able to deliver her child into a relatively low stress environment. I think the best way we can insure a healthy future for humanity is to take good care of pregnant women and insure they will have all minimum needs met during the first years of their child's life. Not sure how to universally accomplish that, but I think it's a noble goal.
I like beautiful people but not everyone I like is beautiful. Diversity rocks and among friends and lovers there is a lot of room for it. Serial monogamy has its problems and so does polyamory.
Good sex and good conversation. The ability to prepare and share good food. I like having a partner in the kitchen as well as a partner in the sack!
Ah! There are so many things to explore with a good partner.
Uh, what was the question?
-Jeff
07-06-2010, 04:16 PM
Thad
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
I mostly just want good sex and good communication.
Its awesome how the same two subjects can mean such vastly different things to the same two people
The things to say here pretty much need to come from censored and uncensored, but a safe thing to say is the 3rd grade phenomena of the division between boys and girls has not been investigated enough.
07-06-2010, 06:12 PM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Thad:
Its awesome how the same two subjects can mean such vastly different things to he and she
The things to say here pretty much need to come from censored and uncensored, but a safe thing to say is the 3rd grade phenomena of the division between boys and girls has not been investigated enough.
Good communication needs a receiver and a transmitter in this case both people are both transmitters and receivers. Person to person communication can be tricky, because all people have a different perspective. I would say good communication is when both people feel that they have been listened to and heard as far as what they wanted to communicate. (This entails asking for clarification and checking to see if you've understood correctly - on both sides.) If one person likes to check in once a day and the other likes to check in once a year, we have a problem.)
In turn, good sex would mean that each partner comes away from the experience feeling that they have received the gift of the other partner's attention to pleasuring them. (This means taking the time to find out what your partner likes, and if you don't even like the same things-you are incompatible.)
It's true that these things are individual for every person and every relationship, but I don't see why we can't define it generally in these terms. (Why does this need to be censored?)
07-07-2010, 08:31 AM
Sara S
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Hey, I love Mykil because he's honest and not mired in verbiage..
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
I think not. Your presuppositions are showing. For example: I would never say to a man "Let's go to coffee so I can judge whether I want to "do" you (within the first 5 minutes!)" Ha ha ha! No self-respecting person of either sex would agree to that.
Plus, I expect the reason you go on these forums is recreational, that you never say anything serious, you like being the devil's advocate and you're probably too scared to meet any woman for coffee, because they are all smarter than you, for the reason that the small head is the one doing all the talking. Still want to meet me for coffee?
07-07-2010, 08:47 AM
mykil
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
I think not. Your presuppositions are showing. For example: I would never say to a man "Let's go to coffee so I can judge whether I want to "do" you (within the first 5 minutes!)" Ha ha ha! No self-respecting person of either sex would agree to that.
Plus, I expect the reason you go on these forums is recreational, that you never say anything serious, you like being the devil's advocate and you're probably too scared to meet any woman for coffee, because they are all smarter than you, for the reason that the small head is the one doing all the talking. Still want to meet me for coffee?
Oh WoW! What is that written across your forehead love? Why don't you drop by my shop and we can talk in person, or you can just browse the little second hand store and see if you see anything you like? But be forewarned, I do date a few so you will have to share! AS far as the devils’ advocate remark, het we all love to tease, just some more than others, and then there are the dry ones...
I stand by a statement such as the one I made for sure, we are all just human love first above all else, then we can be man and woman. once you get past this you are home free. With the rare exception of those that are still hanging on [what are you fifty now?] some get this right away, while others tend to never be enlightened. Evolution is a cruel mistress at times this goes without saying, man and woman friends you ask? I have plenty, but I will only choose the ones that love to play tease and are light enough to enjoy life in particular. And yes I can tell right away when meeting someone if they will be a lifetime friend, lover, or just a wet rag. If you notice I did say someone and not a woman...
Hi Auntie Sara!!!
07-07-2010, 08:19 PM
Braggi
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by mykil:
... And yes I can tell right away when meeting someone if they will be a lifetime friend, lover, or just a wet rag. If you notice I did say someone and not a woman...
I always knew you were bi.
Hey Edward!
-Jeff
07-08-2010, 09:50 AM
Garden Goddess
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
I prefer a quiet, laid back atmosphere where unhurried one-on-one communication is the norm, I like to dance and be joyful as well, but it is too much work to have to separate a lot of different distractions.
For me the words "do me" describes an extremely superficial act. I reacted in a negative way. So, I take responsibility and apologize for that.
The direct speech I prefer, from a potential partner would go something like this," I wish to speak with you in person as a prelude to possible negotiations regarding blissful, mind-altering sexual congress."
In the above verbiage, there can be no mistake as to the general gist of the meeting in question.
07-08-2010, 06:50 PM
Sara S
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
And I forgot to say that I also love him because he's so CUTE! Ah, if I were only 30 years younger....
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by mykil:
Oh WoW! What is that written across your forehead love? Why don't you drop by my shop and we can talk in person, or you can just browse the little second hand store and see if you see anything you like? But be forewarned, I do date a few so you will have to share! AS far as the devils’ advocate remark, het we all love to tease, just some more than others, and then there are the dry ones...
I stand by a statement such as the one I made for sure, we are all just human love first above all else, then we can be man and woman. once you get past this you are home free. With the rare exception of those that are still hanging on [what are you fifty now?] some get this right away, while others tend to never be enlightened. Evolution is a cruel mistress at times this goes without saying, man and woman friends you ask? I have plenty, but I will only choose the ones that love to play tease and are light enough to enjoy life in particular. And yes I can tell right away when meeting someone if they will be a lifetime friend, lover, or just a wet rag. If you notice I did say someone and not a woman...
Hi Auntie Sara!!!
07-08-2010, 07:16 PM
Sara S
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Well, I think "do me" refers to sex, period; maybe the phrase seems superficial, but it's referring to the same act that we all love.
And please forgive me if it seemed that the "verbiage" I mentioned was referring to your posts; that is so not the case. I think your posts are well thought-out and sincere. I just meant that Mykil cuts to the chase, so to speak.
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Garden Goddess:
I prefer a quiet, laid back atmosphere where unhurried one-on-one communication is the norm, I like to dance and be joyful as well, but it is too much work to have to separate a lot of different distractions.
For me the words "do me" describes an extremely superficial act. I reacted in a negative way. So, I take responsibility and apologize for that.
The direct speech I prefer, from a potential partner would go something like this," I wish to speak with you in person as a prelude to possible negotiations regarding blissful, mind-altering sexual congress."
In the above verbiage, there can be no mistake as to the general gist of the meeting in question.
07-08-2010, 11:28 PM
hales
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
I guess I'll just jump in for a sec and observe that the exchange between Mykil and Garden Goddess seems to be nothing more than a difference of personal styles.. : ) I think we each have our own comfort zones, and sometimes we like to stay in them, or sometimes we can be coaxed out of them, especially when it comes to the opposite (or "other") sex. When chemistry is very good, for instance, all bets are off, as the game changes completely.. signals may be contradictory, and what looks like rejection may just be hiding a lot of desire..
In my experience, it's certainly important to be sensitive to the person I am interacting with, and I may even go too far in adapting to someone I am interested in, in a sexual or romantic way. I've been very interested in communication between the sexes for years, and I think I've gotten better at it, yet there is always a certain mystery to it.. and a paradox.. as, sometimes the exact opposite is also true. (for instance, being direct and not over-thinking, before expressing some kind of passion.. may result in failure/humiliation, or may possibly result in breaking through some mutual boundaries to intimacy; a win/win situation! )
As I age, I find I get a lot of enjoyment from communicating and playing with people I am attracted to, and the attachment to the outcome has gone down a bit, (ha ha, I know where you might be going with that.. yes, I meant hormones are less of a factor, but interest and enjoyment is still there.. )
Another factor of aging, for me, is that I really want to see beyond all of the games and trips that people tend to get caught up in and to be more loving and compassionate towards everyone, including my potential lovers, friends, etc.. I do not want to hurt anyone, ("don't want to use nobody, don't want to be abused".. thank you Mr. Dylan)
Well, that's all I have to say at the moment, but I think it's good to talk about this stuff, don't you?
Scott.
09-02-2010, 10:06 AM
Kermit1941
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Quote:
Posted in reply to the post by Lorrie:
Exactly what attracts a man to a woman and makes him want to ask her out?
Is it true the men are not really attracted to skinny women?
Have some fun guys, but be honest.
Hello Lorrie.
I speak for myself only. One strong attraction is if a woman appears to be interested in me.
Another strong attraction is if the woman is tall, or is slim or is near average weight for her height, or shows intelligence in her reactions.
Kermit Rose
01-30-2011, 06:11 AM
nicofrog
Re: Tell me men...What is the truth?
Tell me men...What is the truth?
You want the truth from men? ask me how I know you are sincere?
Exactly what attracts a man to a woman and makes him
want to ask her out? Naturally,this would be different(and rather uninteresting)from every man
the reference to "ask her out" would indicate to me someone who is convinced by,or somehow stuck in "the dating game"
which to me is a guarantee for discomfort,disillusion,and dissatisfaction from the get go. I feel for you if this is true,and invite
you to explore the other realms of relating that we are surrounded by in Sonoma and Marin counties.
Is it true the men are not really attracted to skinny women?
I can't believe this is a serious question,you must just want a vibrant dialect.
Have some fun guys, but be honest.
Honesty,and fun are mostly relative,no? I am bein' "Honest" when I say I am attracted to all women right?
then,if the hell if Phiant is a woman, I am NOT attracted to it, and if it is a man, I am ashamed of it, and not even impressed
by the meager attempts at humor displaced in It's ugly Troll under the bridge behavior. I risk It's scorn
by saying I pity the creature. I can't help visualizing it sulking around the square,in a town full of for the most part friendly kind people.eeew.
I guess I'm seeing the worst part of myself,the selfish greedy judge,who waits for a chink in the armor of others who seem to be having fun
so Hopefully I can redeem a flicker of self esteem by knocking them off their horse.
And Guys, I think you were pretty real..the feminist is right of course (oops I'm objectifying again) but ,uh like its gonna TAKE us some time to
re-learn to think and talk bootie, maybe there's a better way ? Mallory,,you could help us?....Love the shrinking humorous story!I had one of those (oops objectifying again)only i think
it was ME :) Nico Morris a human male not hiding under moniker