New Ones for Lexiphiles

Lexiphiles, (lovers of words you know: i.e., you can tune a piano,
but you can't tuna fish or I wondered why the baseball was getting
bigger. Then it hit me etc.)


To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A.

The professor discovered that her theory of
earthquakes was on shaky ground.

The batteries were given out free of charge.

A will is a dead giveaway.

With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll
show you A-flat miner.

You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under.

A boiled egg is hard to beat.

When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall.

Police were called to a day care where a
three-year-old was resisting a rest.

Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side
was cut off? He's all right now.

If you take a laptop computer for a run you could
jog your memory.

A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.

In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in
feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was
fully recovered.

He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

Those who get too big for their britches will be
exposed in the end.

When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she
thought she'd dye.

Acupuncture: a jab well done