Trump: I would attack ISIS on Twitter

from borowitzrepot.com:

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—In an effort to boost his foreign-policy credentials, the billionaire Donald Trump on Tuesday said that, if he were elected President, he would defeat ISIS with “brutal and relentless” attacks on Twitter.
“Under President Obama, ISIS has been able to maraud and rampage with impunity,” Trump told Fox News. “When I’m in the White House, the leaders of ISIS are going to bear the brunt of the most vicious tweets the world has ever known.”
The real-estate mogul said that, as President, he would set aside a portion of the time that he currently allots to excoriating journalists, politicians, and assorted other perceived enemies on Twitter to focus his fury on the leaders of ISIS.
“Of all the people running for President, I have by far the most Twitter-war experience,” he boasted. “I will declare an all-out Twitter war on ISIS, and I will win.”
Offering a taste of his proposed Twitter campaign, Trump produced this sample tweet: “ISIS is a total joke. Has zero chance of winning. Zero!”
Another prospective tweet read, “ISIS leaders live in tents. Trump has TEN BILLION DOLLARS. Kicks their ass!”
In yet another example, he offered, “Never see ISIS leaders with models. Why? Cannot get models. Models love Trump!”
The former reality-show star also blasted President Obama for having a Twitter account with more than three million followers and never once using it to call Russian President Vladimir Putin a loser.