What is love? [Archive]

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mykil

12-04-2008, 12:50 PM

Growing up over the years, I have been told over and over, time and time again, when I was a young lad that I didn’t even know what love was. After hearing this over and over by sooo many women, I stopped and took a year off and just thought and pondered on this query. Granted this was about fifteen years back, but after thinking about what it was I came to my own conclusions. I have never really varied from the path of enlightenment that I had fulfilled in that years time, but still I wonder what others feel on this subject. Soooo what is LOVE to you? This is a vast question I know, but truly what does love mean to you?

shellebelle

12-04-2008, 01:10 PM

Love!

Ahhh my favorite subject!!!!

I LOVE to LOVE!!! LOVE large!!! LOVE unending!

I recently defined this for myself and here's what I found was true for me!

passion, treasure, friend, amity, attachment, warmth, idolize, embrace, liking, sympathy, relish, adoration, lover, intimacy, mercy, adulate, caress, taste, liking, understanding, adore, savour, infatuation, devotion, sorrow, enjoy, fondle, enjoyment, regard, heart, cuddle, ardour, aroha (N.Z.), darling, like, tender, kindness, canoodle (slang), beloved, charity, cherish, endearment, honey, desire, fond, tender, dear, affection, kiss, sweetheart, fancy, rapture, friendly, dear, warmth, humanity, worship, pet, truelove (archaic), appreciate, adulation, condolence, sweet, enamoured, enthral, charm, besotted, captivate, infatuated, smitten, enrapture (informal), wild (informal)

Love isn't one thing! It's EVERYTHING!!!!

Growing up over the years, I have been told over and over, time and time again, when I was a young lad that I didn’t even know what love was. After hearing this over and over by sooo many women, I stopped and took a year off and just thought and pondered on this query. Granted this was about fifteen years back, but after thinking about what it was I came to my own conclusions. I have never really varied from the path of enlightenment that I had fulfilled in that years time, but still I wonder what others feel on this subject. Soooo what is LOVE to you? This is a vast question I know, but truly what does love mean to you?

Melodymama

12-04-2008, 02:06 PM

My recently expanded understanding of Love is that it is so interconnected with creation and evolution that I can say Love is that energy that gives life, that wants to keep moving, that is all around us when we open to seeing it. Just as any reality is dictated primarily by the perception of the individual, to see the world through the eyes of love (necessarily beginning with loving oneself completely in our incompleteness) means seeing love. When I interact with others in an attitude of love, I love who I am with, I love the environment, I love the world. Smiles are very contageous. Issues and problems present opportunities to recreate or to love that situation in a way that heals. I now hang more with people that see Love and the world this way, and I wonder if it only my perception that has changed. I do act for change, and that is the creative part. It is as if we are constantly moving and to assist with movement that is good for all, we must be inclusive in our life. Listening more, accepting more, finding the positive energy to work through the difficulty.

Since ending a very long relationship, I have reconsidered the physical aspects of Love, and find that I give and recieve many hugs and kisses from friends and family. I say "I love you" much more often. I give flowers and little gifts when I can. I love to affirm.
I miss the place that, Mykil, I know you like to go with that, and I am trying to understand my thinking about sexual activity. My body wants that and I have to get a handle on how my mind and soul can open to that in a less committed relationship. I do not want to confuse myself further by jumping into a scenario that would be hurtful or careless.

Being older and single is not easy these days. Is there a Dating for Older and less inebriated Dummies that want some substance (figuratively speaking) and not strings? Meanwhile,loving myself, my home, my plants, my music, my art, my friends and seeking clarity of some sort. Love is so much more than being "in love."

theindependenteye

12-04-2008, 06:08 PM

>>Growing up over the years, I have been told over and over, time and time again, when I was a young lad that I didn’t even know what love was. After hearing this over and over by sooo many women, I stopped and took a year off and just thought and pondered on this query. Granted this was about fifteen years back, but after thinking about what it was I came to my own conclusions. I have never really varied from the path of enlightenment that I had fulfilled in that years time, but still I wonder what others feel on this subject. Soooo what is LOVE to you? This is a vast question I know, but truly what does love mean to you?

Dear Mykil--

Thank you for asking this impossible question. My response will be a short and feeble attempt to respond, coming from the perspective of having just celebrated 48 years with my life mate, plus close bonds with other people over the years, plus being wedded by the short hairs to my work

For me, it's not an identifiable emotion. At various times it includes a vast panoply of emotions: lust, obsession, astonishment, pain, fairy dust, rapture, pissedoffedness, jealousy, compersion, rage, sweetness, frivolity, oregano, basil, etc. etc.

But the ground of it is trust. I once came across an essay written by a multi-partner family who substituted for the term "being in love" the concept of "being in the space of love." That is, as if you're in the same swimming pool with your other(s). You're there together, you're separate beings, yet you're wrapped in the same water.

That implies a lot. it implies absolute honesty, or at least as much as we fallible human beings can muster. It implies tact and caring, which is sometimes neglected when honesty takes the bit in its teeth. And it implies a terrible degree of responsibility.

Elizabeh and I married as undergraduates, and it's been a bizarre roller-coaster ride through many, many changes — emergencies, kids, lovers, moves, the screaming deadlines, the irreconcilable conflicts, dry spells, sudden breakthrus, the surf, all that. But I'm fairly secure in saying that there's never been a time, even in the times of deepest pain, when we seriously considered the option of splitting. All of the above-mentioned emotions have played a part every year from 1960 to the present, like the play of colors in the sunrise.

In all that, she's cooked dinner and done her work and continued looking at me. I've washed dishes and done my work and continued looking at her. Both of us know we're there for each other, no matter what, because we always have been. We're in the same pool together.

Myself, I don't have many conscious feelings. I'm driven by a compulsion to work, and I do have very intense, present feelings moment by moment, but they're never sufficiently static for me to say "Aha, I feel this!" So I don't know if I feel love for her. I do know that I do love with her. We've agreed to enter into the improvisation, and we'll continue the improv until we croak.

I don't know if that's quite what you asked, and i've been an idiot far too many times to stand as a role model or proponent of anything. I think it's more difficult than it's ever been, for any number of reasons, for people to make that commitment of absolute responsibility that gets you through the impossibilities. So I'd be the last human being on Earth to judge anyone's love life or offer advice.

But I would say it's possible.

Peace, joy and love, whatever's meant by all that—
Conrad

MsTerry

12-04-2008, 07:43 PM

What chapter is this going to be?

Growing up over the years, I have been told over and over, time and time again, when I was a young lad that I didn’t even know what love was. After hearing this over and over by sooo many women, I stopped and took a year off and just thought and pondered on this query. Granted this was about fifteen years back, but after thinking about what it was I came to my own conclusions. I have never really varied from the path of enlightenment that I had fulfilled in that years time, but still I wonder what others feel on this subject. Soooo what is LOVE to you? This is a vast question I know, but truly what does love mean to you?

wunda

12-04-2008, 08:01 PM

positive regard, respect and affection for another being.

I met someone recently who uses that word freely... and it fascinated me.

Love is such a good word, an important word and yet I (and much of society) get hung up about what circumstances the word should be used. This friend, by saying very little about it and expecting nothing said in return, just let loose with that word and feeling. How refreshing.

His expression reminds me that Love is an unquantifiable emotion meant to be shared easily. I think that's why i like the Free Hugs guy so much (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr3x_RRJdd4))

Still, when one loves this easily, how is this differentiated from that deep intimate romantic love?

Sylph

12-05-2008, 01:46 AM

But I'm fairly secure in saying that there's never been a time, even in the times of deepest pain, when we seriously considered the option of splitting. All of the above-mentioned emotions have played a part every year from 1960 to the present, like the play of colors in the sunrise.

In all that, she's cooked dinner and done her work and continued looking at me. I've washed dishes and done my work and continued looking at her. Both of us know we're there for each other, no matter what, because we always have been. We're in the same pool together.

Myself, I don't have many conscious feelings. I'm driven by a compulsion to work, and I do have very intense, present feelings moment by moment, but they're never sufficiently static for me to say "Aha, I feel this!" So I don't know if I feel love for her. I do know that I do love with her. We've agreed to enter into the improvisation, and we'll continue the improv until we croak.

Conrad, that's just beautiful! Thanks!

MsTerry

12-05-2008, 10:43 AM

Growing up over the years, I have been told over and over, time and time again, when I was a young lad that I didn’t even know what love was. After hearing this over and over by sooo many women, I stopped and took a year off and just thought and pondered on this query.

You took a year off from what? Did you go to a monastery?

Granted this was about fifteen years back, but after thinking about what it was I came to my own conclusions.
Are you going to fill us in?

I have never really varied from the path of enlightenment that I had fulfilled in that years time, but still I wonder what others feel on this subject.
What is the Epiphany?
What is at the core of you?

Soooo what is LOVE to you? This is a vast question I know, but truly what does love mean to you?

Love is when you stop missing the other because you are in their presence, no matter where you are.

shellebelle

12-05-2008, 10:59 AM

I agree yet in some ways thats when I miss them the most. To feel and not touch when they are indeed physical is wonderful and torturous simultaneously.

Love is when you stop missing the other because you are in their presence, no matter where you are.

mykil

12-05-2008, 11:21 AM

You MzT. Are actually Brighter than I first anticipated in this lifetime! Most people that are among the book smart are just that. It takes more to be a Bright individual and I think you are coming into your own! LOL! For what that was worth eh?
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I took a year off from all relationships and just focused on myself and family till I could accomplice the task of knowing where I was going, what love was, and how I would go on with my life. I have really never varied from this path of what my intentions are for this lifetime. Love was important to me in the sense that no one truly knows what love is yet there are all the same accusations toward the light! I will give my interpolations toward this later on in this thread! P~E~A~C~E

You took a year off from what? Did you go to a monastery?

Are you going to fill us in?

What is the Epiphany?
What is at the core of you?

Love is when you stop missing the other because you are in their presence, no matter where you are.

MsTerry

12-05-2008, 11:28 AM

I'll assume this is complementerry

You MzT. Are actually Brighter than I first anticipated in this lifetime! Most people that are among the book smart are just that. It takes more to be a Bright individual and I think you are coming into your own! LOL! For what that was worth eh?
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I'll assume this is complemenTerry

MsTerry

12-05-2008, 02:11 PM

Do you miss someone, in the middle, at the beginning or at the end?

I agree yet in some ways thats when I miss them the most. To feel and not touch when they are indeed physical is wonderful and torturous simultaneously.

shellebelle

12-05-2008, 02:58 PM

I miss many yet they are close. I hear, feel and acknowledge them and the energy we share every day. But these are energies that are no longer in this realm/physical realm.

It is a new experience to have someone in this realm/who is physical whose energy actually comes and spends time in my energetic space vs a stop in or a quick hug and heal/balance. And not just once in a while but much like an energetic roommate. Has made me appreciate the shared energy but also frustrated I can't reach out and get that hug in real life.

It is interesting and also makes me want to enjoy the same level of energy with others.

It takes "love" to a new level. One I never even imagined existed. Now I want to explore it.

Do you miss someone, in the middle, at the beginning or at the end?

mykil

12-07-2008, 08:57 PM

MsTerry

12-07-2008, 09:35 PM

I guess I didn't phrase my musings very clear.
Just wondering at what point you feel this surge of longing and overwhelming thinking of the one that is not in your present.
does it start when he is just gone, almost back or somewhere in between.
My surges are usually a little bit after departure, as if I forgot to say something important.

I miss many yet they are close. I hear, feel and acknowledge them and the energy we share every day. But these are energies that are no longer in this realm/physical realm.

It is a new experience to have someone in this realm/who is physical whose energy actually comes and spends time in my energetic space vs a stop in or a quick hug and heal/balance. And not just once in a while but much like an energetic roommate. Has made me appreciate the shared energy but also frustrated I can't reach out and get that hug in real life.

It is interesting and also makes me want to enjoy the same level of energy with others.

It takes "love" to a new level. One I never even imagined existed. Now I want to explore it.